The Way He Loved Me

Part 6

'Oh my gosh. I just kissed him on the cheek. WHY DID I DO THAT! He was just staring there looking at me. What did this mean? Had I just ruined our friendship? Maybe I should just get up and leave...'

These were the kind of thoughts that were going through my head. I was experiencing every emotion possible at once, and it was hard work. I kept waiting for him to do something, ANYTHING, I kept waiting for him to start crying again, for him to yell at me, for something, but he was completely silent. Even his tears had stopped.

"Tyler?" No response. "Tyler.. I'm sorry I didn't mean too. You were just.. crying and I wanted to make you feel better and stop crying and you just.. were there.."

"Allie. I have to go. We can't.. I can't.. We just.. can't.. do this right now.. I'm sorry."Tyler grabbed the letter, got up, and walked out of my bedroom door. I could hear him godown the stairs and shut the front door. I was frozen. I didn't know what to do. I had just tried to show him how much I cared,but ended up just pushing him away.

All I could do for days was sit on my bed where he left me and cry. I didn't think it was that big of a deal... I mean, my head was spinning and my heart almost stopped, but other than that.. it was not too bad. I felt like my world was stopping, and my heart was breaking.. and I hoped that I would die soon so that my heart would be out of it's misery, but no. The days dragged on, and I missed school, and I didn't care. I didn't eat or sleep, and my whole world was one fevered heap of a mess. How. How could he do this to me! We had been friends, we did everything together, and if he wasn't enough of a friend to just laugh and kiss me on the cheek back, then what was wrong with me?

By the start of the second week I decided it was time to listen to my growling stomach and my itchy head and take care of myself for an hour or two. I took a shower and washed my clothes, and I even took the time to make eggs. I was doing fine until a realized halfway through my meal that I had cooked the meal that Tyler had fixed on our first day of school. I fell face-first into my plate and starting crying the tears through tired eyes. I didn't care that my meal was getting messed up, and I certainly didn't care that by now it tasted like tears. I was so tired all I could do was make my way up to my room and retire to my room for the week. What did I do without HIM. How did I live throughout this summer without him.. I didn't know. I promised myself that I wouldn't remember anything about Tyler. I couldn't remember. And while I was laying in bed trying to not think about Tyler, I finally fell asleep trying to think of how I lived without him.

When I finally opened my eyes I knew I had sleeping for too long. It was dark outside, but it didn't feel right. I couldn't tell what was wrong, but I knew that I needed to get up. That's when I realized that I couldn't move.

******Tyler's POV*********

Why did she do that to me? She knew how I liked her! Like her. Doesn't she? I mean... I've told her. right? But. She had to have known that I.. no. She loves me. She can't love me. I am just Tyler. I can't be loved, Not by Allie. I will leave her and break her heart. She needs to find someone.. someone.. like me. That loves her.. but. I can't.

My dad just died. I can't fall in love with someone right now.. I can't drag Allie into any more heartbreak... I can't-

**RIINNGGG**

Thank god. A distraction. I took out my brand new phone to look at the caller ID, but it was an unknown number. Uh Oh.

"Hello?"

"Tyler!! Hey dude! It's Luke!"

Oh thank god! It was Luke! The Luke I met at camp when we were younger. I think we were 14. He used to be my best friend, but somehow I lost his number. He get's all the girls I want. I think he's probably the only guy who is actually hotter than me, but I don't mind. He deserves it. He's been through more than me.

"LUKE! OH MY GOD IT'S BEEN TOO LONG! How are you dude??"

"Okay I guess.... So, I say we should chill soon. Like real soon."

"What about today, or tomorrow. You could spend the night. We could make a party of it!"

"Tyler, I swear, we are not inviting anyone else but you and me. Okay? This is really important."

"How important?"

"Really important dude.. really important."

"Oh.. hey. I'm sorry man... well. I'm having some girl issues too. It's so confusi-"

"It's girls dude. Whaddya expect?"

"Yea, but it's Allie issues. It's super confusing."

"DUDE! DID YOU FINALLY ASK HER OUT!"

Luke! No! we are JUST friends. But I wasn't going to just yell that out. He was going to ask why, but I wasn't going to have an answer. I didn't know why. I bet I could have Allie if I tried REALLY hard, but I knew it would almost be impossible... But. Wait. I had forgotten... She had kissed me on the cheek.

"No man, I didn't ask her out. But, today when I found out some stuff about my dad, and I was crying next to Allie, and she kissed my cheek."

"NO WAY. Dude. I'm so coming over. I'll be there in like.. twenty. Okay?"

"Sounds fine. I'll just order the pizza now. Okay?

"Whatevs. You know my faves okay?"

"Don't talk gay."

"Ha ha. I can if I want!"

And then we both hung up and I starting getting ready for Luke to come over. I was tidying up and throwing out all the old trash when I looked over to Allie's and saw that her living room light was on. I just just see her outline through the curtains, and I couldn't help but smile at her dainty figure gliding. Was she cleaning? Wow. I don't think I've ever seen Allie actually wash clothes by herself. We usually... Did that together. Oh.

*************

Luke finally showed up to my house fifteen minutes late, but I didn't mind. As I was opening the door for him I saw Allie's bedroom light on next door, but I couldn't stop to look for long because Luke was hurling himself towards me for a hug.

After Luke's hug we did normal boy stuff, and actually acted like normal people. We played video games and watch a scary movie, but at the end of it I was really wishing that Allie could have been there so I could hold her hand and feel her arms around me.

"Luke. I need help."

"Getting Allie off your mind? Yea, you do."

"Huh? Oh.. Is it THAT noticeable? Crap."

"Oh nah, you're fine. I only noticed it because you were staring at the window the whole time looking at her house with a glazed look over your eyes. Other than that-"

"OK OK! ha ha I get it! I miss her.."

"Yeah. You keep looking over to that window there"

"So? I haven't looked in about an hour."

"Ehh. True." He looked over to the window and turned as white as a ghost.