Artemis (CanEm Fan-Fiction)

Chapter One

Can said he wanted to be friends and Sanem knew she had to be okay with that. After all, she had been the one who had lied to him. For months she'd both fallen in love with him and made him hate her. She'd hurt him in the worst imaginable way – broken his trust - and she knew she needed to deal with the consequences.

However, actually dealing with the consequences was much harder than she thought it would be.

He wasn't insulting her anymore. There were no pain-filled glances in the office or anger that the other employees excused for bossiness. Can wasn't belittling her or making her feel any worse about lying to him.

But that didn't stop her from hurting.

In fact, it made Sanem feel worse.

She'd been at the agency for a few weeks since that day in the elevator and every day was harder than the last. Every time she looked over at him at his desk, she felt those same butterflies swarm through her stomach. Her hands grew clammy and her words caught at the back of her throat. It was hard, impossibly so, and Sanem knew it wasn't healthy for her to sit in the toilet during her lunch break to have a little cry.

In fact, even her beloved mother had started to pick up on Sanem's change in behaviour. Her eyes were dry and puffy and her hair just that little sloppier. Her mother had seen her sudden change in mood and Sanem knew she couldn't explain to yet another person about how she'd lied to them.

She couldn't bear disappointing anybody else that she loved.

As much as she wanted to let her mother in and tell her why she was suffering, she knew she couldn't. She didn't want to see the disappointment in her eyes when she told her that her and Can had been a couple. And that she'd kept it a secret. 

"Dear, it's not your fault." Like always, her staple brotherly figure, Osman, was ready to comfort her. The two were sat by the coast as the night sky poured in over them, darkness enveloping Sanem like it had been doing over the past few weeks. "What Emre did, it wasn't fair-"

"Neither was what I did." Sanem simply shrugged and looked out upon the endless amounts of water.

"Sanem, you have to stop blaming yourself." Osman wrapped an arm around her shoulders and gave her a light squeeze. "You're not sleeping properly, not eating-"

"Sometimes I wish I was still a grocer, Osman." Sanem sniffled, using the back of her hand to wipe at her nose. "I wish I'd never met him. He'd be happier right now if we'd just never met."

"You can't live life like this, Sanem. If we could all go back and change the past, wouldn't we?"

Osman looked down at his lap and thought of his own unfortunate situation with Leyla. He was in love with her, he had been since they were children, but after learning of her feelings for Emre, sometimes Osman wished he could go back. He wished he could have just looked at her as a friend like he had done with Sanem. It would have saved him from the heartbreak. But deep down, he knew he couldn't go back. He knew he just had to move on and live life in the best way that he could. He had responsibility over Ayhan, ever since their parents had passed away, and he knew he couldn't just give up because a girl hadn't reciprocated his feelings. In fact, Osman was trying to use the distraction from Leyla as an excuse to focus on work. It was a slow but sure process and he knew it needed to be done.

Time would heal all, for both him and Sanem.

"What am I meant to do?" Sanem dropped her head into her hands and felt the tears resurface. "I don't know how to be his friend or just another one of the employees."

"Have you thought about finding another job?"

"I only got this job because of abla." Before now, Sanem had never maintained a full-time job. Her personality was always too eccentric or she somehow managed to annoy her boss before the end of her first shift. She didn't think she was capable of going out into the world by herself and actually succeeding. "No one will hire me."

"Sanem, you're a smart girl. Anyone will hire you."

"No, I don't think-"

"Why don't you work with me?" As if a light bulb went off over his head, Osman jumped up in his seat like an excited child. His abrupt movement scared Sanem and she placed a hand to her heart in a panic.

"What?"

"After doing the events at the agency, I was thinking about doing some more vegetarian catering. It's a good business plan and there aren't that many companies locally. Why don't you help me get it started?"

"I didn't know you were trying to expand the business." Sanem waved a hand in front of her face, pushing her own problems to the back of her mind for just a second. "You're not in any financial trouble, are you?"

"No, no, nothing like that. The truth is, the agency job and the modelling paid well, really well, and I think the income will be good for Ayhan and I. Her life coaching is such a hit and miss and I don't want her to have to worry about money later on in life when she wants to get married or-"

"Why didn't you say something about this before?" Sanem felt bad. She'd been so involved in her own feelings she hadn't even bothered to ask Osman about what was going on in his life.

"You've been upset, Sanem, I didn't want to take attention away from that."

For the first time in what felt like an eternity, Sanem smiled. She never truly appreciated how much the likes of Ayhan, CeyCey and Osman did for her. Despite her romantic troubles, she knew she had to be grateful to God for the considerate friends that she had.

"Thank you for being here, Osman."

"You're welcome, always, Sanem." Osman reciprocated Sanem's smile. "And think about my offer okay? If space from Mr. Can is what you need to get over him then please take it."

And Sanem did think about. It was something that sat on the forefront of her mind for hours; when she went to bed, when she woke up in the morning, when she got into the office. She was so distracted by Osman's work offer that she'd even forgotten to give Can his tea on time.

"Sorry, Mr. Can." Sanem sheepishly walked into his office with the hot cup of tea, her eyes carefully avoiding eye contact with the man that she loved. As she looked up to place the tea on the counter carefully, she noticed a certain curly-haired woman sat awfully close to Can. Her perfectly manicured hand was placed against his bicep and Sanem felt her mouth go dry. The woman was beautiful, with long legs that any gender could appreciate. She looked like she'd stepped off a magazine cover; rich and put together, and Sanem knew, there and then, what she was needed to do.

"Sanem-" Before Can could even utter a response, Sanem knew she had an answer to Osman's question. Just Can's mere scent made her heart pound furiously. His scent mixed with the strong aroma of tea brought back memories of them cuddled together under a blanket that night she'd confessed her love for him. She could feel the sensation of his beard against her cheek and his large hands against her body and it made her want to cry all over again. She wanted that back and she knew it was her fault that she'd lost it.

But what Sanem couldn't do was sit back and watch – as Can's friend – whilst he moved on with someone else. Maybe not with the woman in front of her but Sanem knew, one day, that Can would eventually find another. Maybe he'd find comfort in Polen again like he had done for all those years before or maybe he'd find someone new?

Regardless of who it was, Sanem knew it would end her. Her already crumbling world would disintegrate and she knew that space was exactly what she needed. Osman had been right. 

"Mr. Can, I'd like to resign."