Fidelity

0.2- 'Breathe"

KARIS

Teddy left the room, he walked out swiftly forgetting to take the tension with him. It sat heavily on my lungs. Smoking through my oesophagus taking my courage with it.

Ashton returned a cigar in his hand, he blew the smoke into the atmosphere and ran a hand through his dark hair.

I could not and would not look up.

"You're not telling me something...what are you not telling me?"

"Teddy took his keys, there was a set of keys that Bianchi has never left the house without, I don't know what they are for but I know enough to not give them to Teddy. Teddy stole them and I took them from him, he has figured out they are missing."

"What does this mean for us?" Ashton held onto my face, "Tell me."

I shook my head "Nothing"

He shook his head and chuckled, 

"Ashton you must be delusional, look around you at this mess and you ask me about us." I jabbed him in the chest with my index finger he stepped back and held onto the bar for support, "How could you not see the implications, in this situation. This is not just a 'you and me' situation."

" Alright fine. What was this for Karis?" he shouted at me, he never shouts at me. "WHY??, why the fuck is Teddy telling me we're going to die."

"Because he will do anything necessary to get them back, he hasn't figured out where they are and it's only a matter of time before he does."

"Hide them. I shall help you.

"James is is not that sim-

"You love me, you love me. Like I love you. You need me as I need you - 

"Why are you doing this, Ashton?"

"I don't want to hurt anymore."

"This is so much bigger than us Ashton, can't you see that." I shouted, "Stop thinking about me loving you or you loving me, for one second and look around you. I'm putting your life in danger."

"I can help you. Stop choosing them over me. You are choosing Troi  Johnson over me. You chose to be at his side than be at mine"

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"You play with his feelings, you don't love him but I know you love me"

"I'm not-

He kissed me, sucking more air out of me pushing his tongue into my mouth he pushed me up against the wall and I kissed him back. I shouldn't have but I kissed him back.

I couldn't stop drowning in those green-brown eyes intoxicated my his scent thinking if his lips would taste the same, he could look at me and I'd be putty in his tan hands.

I could breathe, he put into my everything that I have given to him, I kissed him, I wanted to taste him again ignoring the voice in my head telling me to stop. I need him. Just like he needs me.

Forgive me, father, for I have sinned and I want to do it again. For he breathed air into me that I did not know I need until he forced it down my throat. I ask you for mercy if he dies at my hands for I will need your forgiveness as I will not be able to give it to myself.

I pulled away,

"Ashton, we can't do this, you need to go."

"Don't lie to me, if anything please keep your honesty." Again he brought our lips together I breathed again.