Undeniably Inclined.

Chapter 5

Freya

Burying the person I thought I loved is the last thing I thought I'd ever have to do. Everything that is happening is my fault, Adam and Carlisle are risking their lives by doing this and it was all for me. How could I let this all happen. How could I not see James for who he really was.

As we start to dig, I can't help but stop the tears from rolling down my face. Even if he did turn out to be a psycho , he still made me feel special. He made me feel like I was the only one that mattered. His feelings may not have been real but mine were. I can't dig anymore. I'm angry that I let myself be involved with him but I can't deny the fact that I was glad I was the other day. I've never been an emotional person but I put all my walls down for him and got this in return. I can feel a pit in my stomach from the fact I'm going to wake up tomorrow knowing that everything we had was a lie. Adam continues to dig, without him we wouldn't have been able to do this. I stop and fall to the ground. I - I can't do this.

Adam,

"Freya where are you going!"

I start pouring the gasoline over the carpet. I have to fix this.

Carlisle

"Freya stop it! this isn't going to fix anything"

Freya,

"Why? this is what we need, a cover story, we can't say he just fell down the stairs, we have to burn the house. He's not going to need this shirt, this sofa, this TV. He's not going to need anything anymore. He's dead! I killed him!"

Adam,

"We can't make any irrational decisions right now, Freya stop it!"

Freya,

"I spent every moment for the past 3 months hiding from everyone to be with him and now he's gone. HE'S GONE! there's nothing left for us anymore. Nothing."

I light the match.

Adam,

"Freya blow it out! We can figure something out, just slow down and let us deal with it"

Freya,

"No, no, no I - I don't - I can't do this anymore, I - It hurts I - I mean, just make it stop"

I blow out the match and fall to the ground. Why did something like this hurt me so badly. I leave the house and we lock the door.

Adam,

"After we get rid of all the evidence and blood we'll put his body back in the house and burn it all, right now we just need to get out of here."

It's the next day. I didn't sleep at all. All I could picture when I closed my eyes is his blood on the floor, his body in flames. I know he was a bad guy but I think no matter who you kill, the guilt of being a murderer never changes. I look like death so it was easy to convince my mum I wasn't feeling well. I'm pretty sure Adam and Carlisle have done the same. We meet up at Jame's house. The look on our faces of guilt and horror consuming the atmosphere. Adam starts to collect anything of ours and me and Carlisle bring his body back. I can't help but look at his body drained of any colour or emotion. We stand back and light the match. We leave the house and watch it go up in flames. Literally. We hug each other and cry. How did we go from being normal students to covering up a murder?

Another night with hardly any sleep .I can't bear to act like nothings wrong in school but we have to go to so it isn't suspicious. I can still picture his body burning as if I was in there with him. I barely get through school. It's lunch time and I see Carlisle waiting outside one of the toilets speaking to the door. Then I realise Adam's in there.

Carlisle,

"Adam are you alright? have you been sick again?"

Adam is starting to lose it and that's when you know we can't deal with this. This is all my fault, if I had never been with James none of this would have happened.

Adam,

"Guys I'm alright, just act normal we have Spanish next. Get me some lunch or something."

Ms Frow walks in with her eyes red and her voice trembling,

"Guys there is an important assembly in the hall. We need all students to attend. A member of staff has passed away."

Our stomachs roll.