Deathless World

Chapter 10 - Revenge

                          . o 1o

x. Revenge

[ Cleniché's POV ]

It's been a week since na discharge ako ng hospital. It's been a week also since I.... I .

I kissed him on his lips while he's asleep. Look, I did it intentionally. His red lips hooked me up. And besides, I felt my heart beating and telling me to do so. It was a wrong move for a girl like me. But after what I did, mas lalong gumulo ang buhay ko, ang puso at isip ko.

Buong linggo akong hindi pumapasok ng school at hindi lumalabas ng bahay. Sinasabi na rin sa akin ng Uxbridge at Zoher, lalong lalo na ng mga kaibigan ko na laman daw ako ng balita sa school. Topic ng bawat chismisan. Kesyo naduwag na daw ako kasi natalo ako.

For pete's sake. I was beaten up physically, yes. But that's not the reason. I was confused and dont know what to do since my heart never stopped beating weirdly after what I did. Lagi siyang laman ng utak ko and I WASN'T LIKE THIS WITH ANY OTHER GUYS. Pero...

"AHHH! PUTANG*NA!" I screamed at the top of my lungs and threw my pillow away. I'm getting insane.

Naalala ko na naman ang ginawa ko and his face filled my mind again. His face is all over my room. I can see him smiling widely at me through my walls, ceilings, tv, phone and everything na tinitignan ko.

"F*CKSH*T, CHÉ! YO! GIRL! THIS IS NOT YOU FOR PETE'S SAKE! HOW COULD YOU!" I messed my hair na may halong panggigigil. 'What's going on with me?'

Yung puso ko, yung isip ko... Siya lang laging hinahanap. I want to own his lips again and again. I want to hug him and never let him go. I want to be there when he needs me. I want to be around him with every move of him. I want him to be with me only, think only me, dream about me and me and me only. Di ko alam bakit ako nagiging ganito over that nerd. He's not my type. He's not my ideal Prince. Kabaligtaran siya nun. Bakit sakanya ko nararamdaman ang ganito. I never felt this before, 'No. This can't be love'

"NOOO! NOT LOVE! NO! NO! AYOKONG MAGING TANGA! G*GO KA KIEL! IKAW DAPAT PINAGLALARUAN KO, PERO IT END UP AND IKAW ANG NAGLALARO SA NARARAMDAMAN KO!" sigaw ko ulit sabay higa sa kama. Buong linggo na akong gulong-gulo. Buong linggo walang tulog, walang maayos na kain at pagligo. I feel like walking zombie. I looked like a zombie literally.

I was like this kakaisip sa kanya at sa putapete kong nararamdaman para sakanya at sa kahihintay ng text nita. Bawat beep ng phone ko, lagi akong nagmamada para tignan kung sakanya na galing ang text na yun. But lagi lang akong nadidisapppint. T'wing may call naman di explain ang saya na nararamdaman ko. Pero pag di pala siya, frustrated, tapos reject call agad.

99+ new messages, 99+ missed calls pero wala ni isa diyan ang galing sakanya.

"WHY?! AM I NOT IMPORTANT TO YOU FOR YOU NOT TO CALL AND TEXT ME?! OR YOU ARE JUST BUSY SO YOU CAN NOT FIND TIME TO ASK IF I'M OKAY OR NOT?!" srsly?! I'm talking with his picture on my phone. What the heck is going on with me?! Ngayon ko lang napansin na more than 100 pictures niya ang nandito noong nasa hospital pa ako at siya nagbabantay.

Gusto ko nalang maiyak sa sakit ng nararamdaman ko. He didn't bother to text me even just a blank text message. That's too simple but I could take it as a big effort that no one can ever do. A simple blank message without anything on it would make me feel so important for him, but, that's drawing near to impossible, I think. He don't want me by his side. He don't want me around him, which it turned out to be the other side I'm longing for, I want to be around him even in his sleep. I want him to dream only about me.