Sick ( A Randy Fanficton)

perfect

        The hours turn into days and days into a month. A month I spent at the gym, A month i spent drinking the grossest smoothies and shakes, it was starting to happen, my biceps were turning to muscle, i was going to the gym two sometimes three times a day. Whenever Andrea told me to. My trainor told my it was unhealthy because I keep passing out but I tell him I have to do it. He never argues with me just looks confused and disappointed. I have a surgery for my nose scheduled for a month from today. It made Andreia really happy she booked the appointment and when I came home she hugged me tightly and I swung her around and she planted little kisses all over my face. i was happy because she was happy. I finally set her down after tons of squeals and laughter, he hands on each of my cheeks and close to me says whsipers "we are fixing you up, youre gonna be perfect" she says with the biggest smile. How could i not be excited to make her  happy?" For the next three weeks I tend to the gym and get better and stronger and my surgery is in a week, I will be amazing for her. I smile all the way home from the gym that day. I walk in the apartment door and back to the bedroom to find her and there she is yet again with another guy. I storm off and i hear her pleads for me to come back. I stop and stand there in the hallway with her wrapped in a blanket, naked underneath. They guy rushes past me trying to put on his pants and falls down the steps but right now i don't care. "please" she says quietly. "How long" i demand. "what?" "how...long" i space them out. Now i just sound hurt. "about a month" she says. "while i've been trying to fix myself for you" i say and fall to my knees. She comes over to my and lifts my chin and says " I was gonna stop once you were perfect darling...this was just to get me through" she says. I look up hopeful and she smiles weakly. "you promise you'll stop once i'm perfect?" i ask her. "I promise" she says and helps me stand up and walks me back into the apartment. A year passes i still go to the gym everyday and eat "right". I got my nose done and she loves it. Another year passes and this morning she told me that i can stop today, that i am perfect now and ill be getting something special tonight. " I want to go one more day" i smile. "if you want" she says smiling.  Things have been so good lately i just loved to see her like this. I go to the gym and when i come back she has made a really nice dinner and bought a cake. "congrats" she says and kisses my cheek. That night we eat and i remember to pace myself. Then we watch a movie and wind up having sex, ive been with her for about four years almost and this is the first time. I decided to go visit my mom for once, i never seem to do it anymore. When i get there i tell her all about how Andriea cheated but she fixed me and made me perfect and she really loves me and she just confirmed what i had been denying all along. "honey, you don't have to change for anybody she did not fix you or make you perfect. For one you did all of this yourself and for two it's really not up to me but i think you should leave her. Letting her cheat until you are "perfect" and letting her convince you that you are ugly and worthless is not okay. its not up to me sweets but i would do it." She tells me. After about an hour I leave and drive home, i knew she was right I needed to leave she was toxic i would tell anybody in my shoes the same thing i just failed to realise and now i feel like it's too late. When i get home she questions me about why i seem distant, she tries to kiss me but i get up and move away from her. "WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?" She yells and i just walk down the hall and into our bedroom. I sit on the edge of the bed and I put my head in my hands. "I made you perfect..." she says almost dissappointed. 'talk back, tell her what you think' my brain say but i just stay where i am. "but your still worthless" she says. "i loved you" i say looking at her blankly. "and i thought you loved me but people who love someone dont make them change for their own benfits." i say. She looks shocked at my response. in four years i have never talked back to her, always let her make me think it was my fault even when SHE cheated. All these years I was loyal to her. "You didn't have to do any of it" she says. "i changed and i will admit i like having abs and I like being strong but i was also okay with who i was and i felt fine in my own skin but every day because of you i looked in the mirror and saw everything wrong with me, you made me hate myself. but i loved you. you had sex with god knows how many guys and i had only you. you were my damn everything and i let you treat me like this. you say you cheating on me was my fault but if you really believe that you are a dumb bitch that needs a reality check because that is wrong on so many fucking levels" i tell her and now im centimeters away from her face and angry. She is shrunk down like shes scared of me. "I'm done, im leaving" i say. and turn and grab my suitcase from under the bed. "where are you going?" she says worried. "oh yeah, i didnt tell you I have auditions for a fucking boyband far away from here, i was supposed to leave next week but it looks like i can just go tonight seeing as how i don't need to be here anymore." I say and out the last of my clothes in my bag. "dont go" she says and starts crying. i have my phone and charger in hand, my car keys, i have on a hat and have put my coat on. "im sorry" she says. "fuck you" i say and walk out the door. I start driving and call mikey from the band ive gotten fairly close with the boys over messaging and calls. "hey mate, wassup" he says. "hey can i com early...like tonight please?" "yeah, but why whats up?" he asks. "you can't tell the others okay?" i say. "promise" he says. For almost the whole three hour drive I am explaining and crying to him about it.

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hi! im sorry that the flashback was pretty long and some of the time periods might not match up and im sorry i tried very very hard on this!