When Love Bites

22 Closer

Chapter 22 Closer

He curled around me and I relaxed into his arms. This wasn't over. but we would get there. I woke sometime later with my face pressed into his neck. I sighed and figured I could wait to get up until he was awake.

I slept hard enough to drool and wake up loopy and confused. My eyes hurt from crying, but Lizzie was tucked neatly under my chin. I rubbed her back and attempted to wake her. "Lizette, Lizzie, Baby."

"Hmmm. I'm awake."

"Okay, let's get you some food huh. You haven't eaten anything all day."

"Mmmkay. Still not hungry. Potty first." I rolled away from him and headed for the bathroom

"I'll keep it light then." I went out and looked around in the fridge. I found some chocolate pudding, whipped cream, and the yellow Oreos. I put water on for tea took the stuff to the coffee table and started to light a fire. I grabbed the blanket off the couch and threw it on the floor and moved it around until it looked like it would be comfortable. I sat down in the middle of it grabbed the junk food and waited for Lizzie.

I came out of the bathroom and made my way to the living room. He was sitting on a blanket in front of the fire. I joined him and took an oreo.

I offered her a spoon and dipped an Oreo in the pudding then put whipped cream on top and shoved the whole thing in my mouth. "This is so bad for us," I said then slapped my knee. "I'mma dork."

"It is, but yummy." I sighed. I was trying to be hungry. I was still hurting from the loss of my friends. I still had to tell him what I did.

I studied her face and let her emotions wash over me. "What is it?" I put my spoon down. "This is more than just me and our fighting. Are you okay? Baby." That feeling hurts me too. I was already raw and open, her pain felt like a white hot poker to me.

I swallowed and shook my head. "I did what you told me to do."

"Oh! Not good?"

"You were right. I told them both that I couldn't continue being friends with them if that was the case."

"Oh, Sweetheart. I didn't want that for you. Can I hold you?"

I crawled into his lap and cried. I couldn't stop it.

"I'm so sorry. Love. So sorry." I rubbed her back while she cried.

I was hurt and he knew it. In the long run, it was for the best, but that didn't make it any easier. I really would do just about anything for him. Sometimes love bites. I just let him hold me while I cried it out.

I held her until she stopped crying and didn't move until she decided that she wanted too.

The tears stopped and I needed to move. "Shower?"

I grabbed another cookie and shoved it in my mouth. "Pudding first?"

"Okay." I climbed out of his lap and picked up my spoon. I still didn't have much of an appetite, but I did eat some pudding.

"Okay. I'll put this away and join you in the shower."

I got up, went to the bathroom and started the shower. I stripped, got under the spray and waited for him to join me. I needed the closeness but not the sex. I hoped he knew.

I joined her in the shower. I lifted her chin and kissed her gently. I didn't pry or push, I just kissed her tenderly and turned her so she was under the spray again. "It's gonna be okay."

I nodded. "I know and it's probably for the best. We're going to be okay, right?"

"Right. Ready to wash or want to just hang out for a bit first?"

"I wanna hang out a bit. Or wash and snuggle in bed."

"That sound perfect to me. We can eat when you feel more like doing it."

I let him wash me and then I washed him. I dried off and put on some panties and a nightgown. We laid in bed together. He held me and I fell asleep. I woke sometime later. I was hungry but I really didn't want anything. He made me some eggs and toast. I ate it with and drank a bottle of water and then retreated back to bed. Things between us were still weird and tense, but we were together.

I didn't need to say anything so I didn't. I knew what my own depression felt like and am very grateful that the sadness only comes in occasional waves. She didn't have to ride her wave alone and I no longer had to as well. That was a good thing. I didn't want to be right about those boys, but it turns out I was. If they found girlfriends and settled down Lizzie should be able to rekindle that friendship to some degree and that would make her happy, but I wasn't about to mention that. They would blame it on me. Everyone always does when one half of the relationship has the hang-ups that I do, but it comes with the territory. I was happy to hold her while she slept. I wished she'd eat proper but that would return in time. Once she was asleep again I slipped out of bed to the kitchen and grabbed a snack. I was expressly hungry which meant my own emotions had returned to normal. I made a few calls and worked on Valentine's day reservations and plans. A nice card, a nice quiet dinner away from the run run run we had been stuck in would suffice nicely. I just had to get her there. I sat at the kitchen table and lost track of time again when I picked up the notepad and pen. I eventually found my guitar and started writing a song.

I woke up to hear the sounds of his guitar. I glanced at the clock, it was very late at night or very early in the morning depending on how you looked at it. I followed the sound and just stood in the doorway and listened for a bit. It was slightly sad but had a hopeful feel to it. He stopped when he saw me. I wiggled my fingers. "That was pretty." I sighed. "It is very late. Do you have work today?"

"Thanks. Tomorrow. Feeling a little better?"

I nodded. "A little. Kinda hungry. How are you?"

"I've been making music. Worried about you mostly. Sorry I didn't come back to bed. I enjoy our snuggle time."

"Me too. Wanna go back to it after a snack?" I went into the kitchen and started pulling out the ingredients for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. "I do love when you make music. Sorry to make you worry."

"Snack, yes. That comes with the being in love part." I walked up behind her and put my arms around her. I kissed her neck gently and stepped away. "Want help?"

"Mmm yes." His kiss made my skin tingle. "Want a sandwich?"

"Sure." She didn't need the help I gave her but it was relaxing to work together to get something done. We ate together. After I put everything away, we wander off to bed hand in hand.

I let him lead me to bed and settled into his arms as we laid down. It felt nice, and warm, and safe. I whispered my love to him as I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep.