The Eighteen Year Fallout

Chapter 16

Alexa's head felt heavy and fuzzy. When she attempted to open her eyes, it felt as though the room was spinning. When she tried to call out to someone, her mouth was too dry to even pry her lips apart.  What was wrong with her?

“Lexie? Honey?” she recognised that voice.

Her Mom.

Alexa was surprised when she mustered up the strength to pull herself slightly up so that she was sitting. Her eyes were still firmly closed avoiding the dizziness but she opened them slowly, letting them adjust to the light. She could see that she wasn't in her own bedroom. This room was scarcely furnished and everything appeared very clinical. Her last thought triggered something. Clinical.

The memories of her dad shouting at her, telling her she’d ruined everyone’s lives. Praying that it would all go away and swallowing at least three times the prescribed dosage of pills. Everything turning black. It was all coming back and hitting her like a tonne of bricks.

She was in hospital.

“Alexa honey, it’s your mom. Can you hear me?”  Lissa asked concern etched over her weary face.

Alexa nodded vigorously, and put her hand to her throat. She guessed her mom knew what she was trying to say as she reached over to the table at the side and poured her a plastic cup of water from a beaker sitting on it. She handed it to Alexa gently and her hand shook as she took it from her meaning she had to hold it with both hands to prevent herself from spilling it. The cold liquid slipped down her throat cooling the burning sensation until the cup was empty.

Alexa cleared her throat before saying, “Hi mom”

Her mom didn't answer. Instead she hugged her, her hold on her tight as if she never wanted to let go ever again. Alexa guessed she hadn't thought how this was going to affect her mom when she’d went through with it. She'd been so intent on ending her pain that she didn't think about the pain her actions were going to cause.

She cleared her throat awkwardly and her mom pulled away with an apologetic expression on her face.

“Sorry darling” she muttered and Alexa smiled to reassure her that it was fine.

Suddenly a thought came to her.  Something she hadn't considered when she started the whole thing.

“The baby?” she whispered tears pricking in her eyes.

She held her breath as she waited for her mom to speak.

“She’s perfectly healthy, Alexa” she beamed rubbing her hand soothingly, “Of course she was three months early so she's very very weak but everything's looking hopeful. Carson and Taylor are down in the nursery with her at the moment. They've hardly left the hospital if I’m honest”

She had a daughter. A daughter who had been three months premature because of her rash decisions.

She felt her eyes well up at her mom’s revelation and she tightened her grip on her hand. For some reason when it came to this baby – and the whole Carson drama – she was an emotional wreck. She remembered when she was younger her mom used to jokingly tell her that she was as hard as nails as she would always refuse to shed a single tear when she’d hurt myself. She guessed her hormones were finally changing that.

Alexa wiped her damp eyes with her hand and she couldn't help but smile. For once everything was working out and for the better at that.  The one thing that caused heartache to surge through her body though was the absence of her father. So far her mom hadn't mentioned him and after his verbal lashing at his “disgrace” of a daughter, she highly doubted he was even in the vicinity.