Cinderella? NO

Maryam

My 1st month in school was the worst, in my class I had no friends, they were all old and working class people who worry only about office and their kids. The following month on Tuesday lecture, the lecturer was telling us about Cold War when the door opened and everyone paused, my head was down as I was jotting some points down when I saw a figure at the door, I glanced up and saw the most beautiful creature of Allah since I came to Dubai; he's tall; very tall, well built, good looking, clean and to top it all, young. That's the whole point, he's young and hot. He wore white long thobe and wrapped his head, like turban. It looked so beautiful on him. He introduced himself as Khalifa, Emirati, 24 years old. After Khalifa joined the class, I felt a ray of hope, after the class, he went to my sit and gave me his hand, I smiled and he believed I don't shake hand with boys. After few classes together we became kind of close and he told me about his struggling mother, his dead father and his fiancée. Though Khalifa is hot, I didn't feel anything towards him, I wondered why, he's lacking something I think or does something I hate. The problem with Khalifa is that he brags, typical Arab man. He once asked me if I've ever taken Starbucks coffee. He thinks it's too expensive for a Nigerian girl or what? Although I don't wear Prada or Michael Kors but I'm sure as hell know that I don't go around looking tacky. I grew to like Khalifa as a friend because he always listens and helps me. The 1st paper I submitted, my lecturer said I wasn't making any sense and that I should rewrite it. I cried so much. I called mum, she laughed at first but assured me that I would do better. I told Khalifa about it and he said we should complain about the lecturer, that the lecturer was being unprofessional. Everything a lecturer does to Khalifa is unprofessional. There was a time our 2nd lecturer delayed to give us our score, Khalifa complained that she's so unprofessional, lazy and partial. After few months, he told me she's hot and that he has a crush on her.
My days went by in extreme boredom and I started to apply for jobs online, about a month passed but I didn't receive a single call from anybody. After Khalifa, another Emirati joined our class, he is calm, reserved and I always feel there's some awkwardness between us. Whenever I meet his gaze in class, he looks away. Our prayer athan ring at the same time and he always feels kind of shy and I think he learned to keep his phone silent because the athan stopped ringing while mine never seize to remind people how I care so much about Salah. I learned from Khalifa, the boy; Saleh owned a company and he's very rich. Without wasting time, I asked him for a job and he contacted his friend. In a week, I got a job as a secretary at a yacht rentals company. It makes me smile whenever I recall my 1st physical conversation with Saleh, he is very shy, when I approached him, he was stammering and avoiding my gaze by all means. He's cute and I like the way he calls my name; "MaRyam", he stresses the R. He makes me have butterflies and because of him, I stopped eating before class, so as not to ruin my Ruby woo Mac lipstick and sometimes my YSL lipstick. Why would Khalifa think I can't afford Starbucks coffee when I can remove a $100 to buy lipstick (I hate him). I upgraded my makeup because of Saleh and trust me it worked, because his gaze on me increased. The reason I liked Saleh was because he's so simple and doesn't look like someone that owns Lamborghini and Porsche. I think he is religious because I never saw him smoke, unlike Khalifa and the rest of my classmates that wait for our 15 minutes break to light a cigar. And at least he has alarm for Salah, because it doesn't make sense to keep an alarm for Salah when you don't pray. I stalked Saleh on every social network but I didn't send a friend request or follow him, what I did was check his posts every day, being very careful not to hit the 'like' button. Just seeing his updates satisfied me. I learnt he's my age mate, 23 and has a connection with the royal family of Dubai. Khalifa would have fake a call and tell me it's from one of the princes if he knew them, but Saleh never showed anyone in class how rich and strong his connections were.
My office started getting boring and tiring, after subh prayer I don't go back to sleep. I wake up 5am, shower, pray, eat something and catch the 3rd train to Rashidiyya, then take a bus to
Silicon Oasis. 1 hour 30 minutes journey every morning and evening. I started losing weight and always make a silent prayer for my dad, because I realised what he endured to provide for us. Sometimes when I leave really early, I come across a boy on his way back from the masjid and when I come back in the evening, I meet him on his way to masjid for maghrib prayer. At first I don't even stare, but later on, I started staring and sometimes he meets my gaze and smiles at me. Sometimes he ignores me (Intentionally. Maybe he thinks I am a creep). Without realising I came to look for him around using my eyes(obviously), sometimes I wait for him to come out and pretend I was passing. One time I was on my balcony with Rose and Rabiah, we saw a boy coming out from villa one's laundry room, lo! And behold, it was that boy. I almost screamed and told them about him and my feelings for him. I found out his villa is opposite mine, so I stopped waiting for him at the boys' villas' gate and started looking, and stalking him from my balcony. The villas were so close that girls and boys communicate through their balconies and windows. Sometimes I see him cooking, sometimes coming out of the laundry room. He never noticed my creeping Alhamdulillah.
Humaira; a very nice Kashmiri I met told me about a girl from Nigeria and the same state as me. We decided to visit the girl and something happened to me. The shock of my life. Our 1st
meeting was just introductions, then our meetings increased because I found out her married uncle used to like Billy and he promised his wife not to marry again but he told Billy "I can't wait to have you as my second wife. I know my wife would love a co-wife". I also found out she knows so many people I know. Her name is Zahra. I've always seen Zahra covered and reserved and she takes religion seriously. As our love increased, she told me everything about her. One day I went to her room and opened her wardrobe, I saw like 5 pieces of Abaya 3 veils and long pants. I could count everything in her wardrobe. I asked if she took her clothes to laundry and she said that's all she had. Amazed I asked her "why?" because her family is very rich, so I found it odd for her to have few pieces of clothes. She said that's not all, that she has 2 pairs of sandals, 1 bag. I was awed and asked "WHY" she said "I am a minimalist and owing too many luxuries complicate life." I had to wait for few seconds before I responded, because I didn't understand what she said. When I went to office the next day, I searched on 'minimalism in Islam'. I saw how the sahabas(companions) had wealth but chose to live simple lives. In my whole life, I had read books about Prophet(saw) and his sahabas and I saw how they lived their lives in minimum condition but it never made sense until Zahra explained to me. Zahra would spend a 1000 dirhams on food every week but won't buy a bag or shoe. She explained to me that owning luxuries is halal but the love shouldn't reach to some extent. She also told me that when you start caring about your akhira(hereafter) more than anything, you will realise that owning the luxuries don't even make sense (and that's the stage she's on). I never knew what being religious was (not even sure if I knew what it means) until I met Zahra. I thought a Muslim that prays, fasts is religious but I realised that kind of Muslim, is just a Muslim. I took books from Zahra and read. My searches on YouTube changed from latest Rihanna song to seerah my Yasir Qadhi and Mufti Menk's lecture at Brooklyn or in Malaysia. One Thursday night, I woke up to pray tuhajjud (night prayer) and broke down completely. I cried so much and loud that Rose had to wake up and ask if I was okay. Something Yasmin Mogahed called 'awakening'. That was what happened to me, everything I knew about Islam that doesn't make sense, made sense in that night. I used to hear music is haram but I never took it serious. I would listen to music, listen Qur'an, listen to an Islamic lecture and watch E! News. That night I realised that it's impossible, you can't love Shaitan (the devil) and Allah with the same heart and I knew I have one heart. I realised I can't dress or make up to impress people while upsetting Allah(swa). In that moment, I gave myself two choices, to choose between The One that gave me life, made me a Muslim, gave me health and wealth, made me pass my exams, gave me knowledge of the Qur'an, The One that loves me more than my mum does, The One that is more merciful to me than my dad is to me, and the one that wants nothing but my destruction, the one that would love to see me burn in hellfire, the one that would deny me on the day of resurrection. I am a wise girl and I chose the former. Even the choosing made me cry because Allah loves to make me realise the truth and made me wise enough to choose what is better for me. That night changed me, I felt like a revert. I felt new in Islam, I became more emotional. I cry over little things (when I see a person reading Qur'an or helping someone). Some part of me I never knew existed opened. I deleted my latest Adele album that I bought on iTunes and other songs. I stopped wearing perfume to go out. The thing I had problem ditching was my makeup. Then an idea came to me, I started by avoiding lipstick, then eyeshadow, then foundation and mascara until I ditched even powder. The only I didn't stop wearing was my kohl. After ditching makeup, wallahi I came to look at myself more in the mirror, and whenever I look, I see this beautiful strong woman. My heart smiles. And boys, from Tom Cruise to Neymar to Saleh. I stopped liking them all except that one guy from villa 1. I adopted niqab (face veil). I became close with Zahra, very close. I told Zahra about that boy and she told me he's in her class. I was so happy and believed that God brought her to be to get access to him. She told me his name and everything she knew about him; he's Nigerian, 22 years old and religious. Whenever I meet with Zahra, we talk about Ahmad, sometimes we laugh at him and sometimes we praise him. He's cute and whenever he's pissed; sometimes because of the music the shuttle driver plays and sometimes because of boys that follow girls around, it is always funny. Zahra always says we have to ask for his forgiveness before leaving Middlesex. I agreed with her (May Allah forgive us).