The Struggle Is Real

chapter thirty : out

a/n hey guys so wattpad sucks it's deleting all my drafts that I've been working on for hours now. i honestly give up so this is really going to suck.

chapter thirty:

"Marilyn, no. No no no no. Don't do this. No. Nooo. Please. Mari, come on. Serioooouuusly. Don't. Mar. Come on. Stay with me."

The wind felt soft and rushed on my cheeks as I tried to open my eyes a little. Trent and my brothers grasped my hands desperately while running with the stretcher as the doctors rushed me down the hallway.

"Get her to the room. We've got the rest." The pale blue uniform urged. A male voice mumbled a 'yes ma'm' and shoved the gurney foward, busting through the doors. It smashes through, causing the stretcher to lurch foward. Pain is nothing.

"It'll be okay."

I tried to move.

I didn't.

I couldn't move.

Imagine this.

You're in a room. It's empty. You can't hear anything. It's obvious no one is there. You attempt to lift your arm. You can't; it resists your action, clamping your arm down like there are irons holding it back. But there are no bindings keeping you down. There is darkness everywhere. Nothingness surrounds you. You make an effort to lift your leg, you believe you can do it. If you try. Right? Wrong. It completely fails, the only thing moving is your faith in yourself. You're completely paralyzed. You're completely alone. You try to sniff the air, smelling nothing. You try to open your eyes, seeing nothing. You try to rub your fingers, feeling nothing.

All your efforts are lost. Nothing helps. Nothing works.

Feeling is gone.

Everywhere.

Now snap out of it.

But I can't.

I'm stuck, the void growing larger by the minute.

Which I wouldn't know, time is but a number.

As I watch the darkness of the nothingness, my last thought resorts to:

'what has he done to me?'

...................................................

a/n i've never been paralyzed, but this is what i imagine it would be like. if you or anyone you know has gone through this terrible difficulty, my heart goes out to you today, and everyday.