Love in Chipilo-Drabbles Scomiche

30: Submission

We spent all night there and the next morning, we all drove following the coffin car to the church in Chipilo.

The mass started, and the old priest was there looking at the people like he could barely talk. Mitch started crying again and the priest pouted trying to control himself.

"I have been here quite a long time..." He said. "I met Pablo when he was fourteen maybe. He came here to confess, and this is supposed to be a secret between me, he, and God, but we all came to the conclusion that it shouldn't be a secret a long time ago and is not a secret anymore. In that confession, he said that he and Mitch were coming to this church before they even met each other. That his parents were doctors and didn't believe so much in God because they were people of science. He said his grandparents made them come every Sunday before the family gathering in their home before breakfast and that he liked to come every Sunday. He said that Mitch and he made their first communion here with the former priest and that they were even altar boys for a couple of years. He said 'I believe in God, but I think I'm not coming back.' I asked him why and he started crying and he said 'I kissed my best friend... and I like him a lot... He feels the same way but we know that church... doesn't accept us, and we refuse to think that what we feel is wrong, because this is love, is real love, and people might think we are too young to know that but we know that what we feel is genuine.' I... was speechless... A couple of good boys, never better said, who loved God, the church, and what it represents were about to go far from here because they thought we were going to reject them. The boy was a crying mess because it hurt him to make this hard decision. That's how, I knew for the first time in my then-already long life, the unnecessary pain that the homophobic rhetoric of church caused in the faith of young people. I couldn't let him go thinking God hated him and his boy, I asked him to get out of the confessional to talk in my office, and outside, Mitch was waiting for him crying in submission in front of me. They felt guilty for something that shouldn't be signaled. They were raised to love God and they felt like they were failing. There wasn't such a thing. I told them they didn't have to choose, they could have both, that God loved them, God made them that way after all, the relief on their face was significant and I asked them to bring their parents to talk, they did, and they were firm not just in their love but also in their faith. They both came Sunday after Sunday, they came to the retirements for young Catholics, learning the word of God and making bonds with other young people. Two years ago, after the earthquake, Puebla city and Chipilo suffered a bit, not as much as Mexico City, of course, but we had our problems and they, as good men, came to the church to help, when that was slightly solved we went to Mexico City to help the church there, to feed people that were working so hard to save people that were still under the buildings. Now I understand this and I hope the rest of the church understands this someday too. God doesn't care about sexual orientation, God loves you anyway and he just wants you to be a good person. This is a tragedy for all of us as a community. His parents lost a good son, Mitch lost his fiance, Chipilo lost a young talented man that built beautiful houses around here... And the way we lost him... The only reason that I can imagine God took him is... that God needed some help up there and he needed an angel." The priest and Mitch broke into tears. "He was that good." He said. "He was that good."