Missing

Chapter 3

Larry and Cynthia were already seated at the table when we made it to the kitchen.  I sat at the other end of the table to be further away from them.  Jared sat to my left and Evan was to my right, Alana was next to Jared.  I rolled my eyes as Larry introduced himself to everyone, shaking each of their hands.  He noticed and shot me a brief glare, which I returned.  I prodded the food in my bowl with my fork, I didn't have an appetite.  Once everybody was settled and began to eat, Cynthia spoke up.
      "So did you guys do anything fun at the park?" She questioned.
       "Mom, we just looked for Zoe.  I told you over the phone." I murmured.  Her face went from a smile to concerned quickly.  "It's not like I went alone this time!" I argued.
        "But you shouldn't drag your friends into this--"
        "Umm-- actually Mrs. Murphy Connor didn't want us to go with him, we kinda forced him to let us come," Alana defended me.  I wanted to smile but didn't have the energy to. 
         "True that." Jared commented with his mouth full of food.  Evan shyly nodded in agreement.
        "I don't know why you even bother, Connor.  You're not gonna find her-- she's not coming back," Larry growled.
       "You don't know that!" I snapped at him.
       "We both know how much you miss your sister but that gives you no reason to yell at your father!" Cynthia scolded me and I laughed.
        "I always yell at him!  I yell at both of you!  I don't know why you get mad at me for trying to find Zoe-- I thought you loved her!" I slammed my fists onto the table, causing Evan to nervously jump in his seat and Jared to laugh at him.  Alana looked concerned about the fight going on between my parents and I.  She opened her mouth to interfere but I stopped her.  "No, don't get involved,"  I warned.
        "Connor, don't start this now," Larry hissed through gritted teeth.  I rolled my eyes but didn't reply, not wanting to cause anymore quarrels in front of everyone.
        "So how did you guys meet Connor?" Cynthia asked, changing the subject.
        "Well I saw Evan talking to him so I walked over," Jared explained.
        "Yeah, he umm-- he signed my cast,"  Evan nervously added and lifted his broken arm to show my parents.  They exchanged glances.  I couldn't interpret the meaning of them, but it probably wasn't good.  I scowled at them and looked over at Evan.  He was back to anxiously prodding the gluten free pasta Cynthia prepared.  Even if I were hungry, I'd rather starve than eat that shit.  However, I forced a mouthful down my throat, hoping Larry wouldn't question me about not eating for the past few days.  The conversation melted into an awkward silence.
       "This pasta is very--" Jared started.
       "Inedible," I finished his sentence.
       "I was gonna say delicious but--"
        "Connor," Larry hissed.  "Apologize to your mother!"
        "Oh, go fuck yourself, Larry!" was what I responded with.  I knew it would get me into trouble but I didn't care.  Larry stood up, a few drops of pasta sauce flew from his fork, which he had violently placed in his bowl, and stained his shirt.  I stood up as well, although Evan tugged on my sleeve, trying to get me to sit back down.  For a while there was just silence as Larry and I stared each other down.  I noticed Cynthia shoot me a pleading look.  I reluctantly sat down, muttering somewhat of an apology.  I realized Evan was slightly trembling next to me.
       "You okay?" I whispered as Cynthia said something to Alana, acting as if nothing happened.  Evan shook his head in response.
        "N-- no, I just-- I got scared-- sorry-- I-- I need to get out of here." Evan's breathing grew faster with each word.
        "Hey, it's okay." I went to help him up but stopped myself.  "Um-- do you need help?  I can take you upstairs to my room away from everyone," I suggested.  I didn't want to touch him-- I knew from my own anxiety attacks that sometimes physical contact is a huge no-no.
        "Y-- yeah-- Thanks," Evan stammered and let me lead him up the stairs to my room.  I heard Larry call after me but I ignored him.  Moments later, I heard footsteps running up the stairs.  I sat Evan down on my bed and prepared to snap at Larry, but it was Jared who flung open my door instead.
       "What the hell, Kleinman!" I snapped, which made Evan flinch.  "Sorry," I quickly apologized.  Jared immediately sat on the other side of Evan.
      "Is touch okay?" He asked in a tone which made it obvious he had to deal with this frequently.  Evan nodded through tears.  Upon hearing this, Jared placed a hand on Evan's shoulder.  Evan flinched but didn't resist at all.  I watched as tears streamed down Evan's face and his chest was rising and falling unusually fast.  He was shaking and had a hand rested on his knee, which he focused on through his tears.  Without thinking, I gently rested my hand on top of his.  He didn't pull away or protest, instead he tilted his head to glance at me and half smiled, before looking back down at our hands.  I glanced over at Jared who stood up and brushed off his pants.
        "We should give him some space." He announced.
         "I'll be down in a minute." I told him.  Thankfully, he left so it was just Evan and I.  "Hey Ev, where's your phone?" I asked softly.  He used the hand that wasn't covered by mine to reach into his pocket and hand me his phone.  He didn't have a passcode on it, so I went to his contact app and added my number.
       "I added my number to your phone.  If you need me for anything just text me, I'll be downstairs." I forced myself to move my hand away from Evan's and got up.
       "Stay," Evan squeaked shyly.  "Please."
       "Are you sure?  I--"
       "Please." Evan begged.  I sat down next to him again and texted Cynthia, letting her know I was going to stay upstairs with Evan.  We sat in silence for a few minutes, until I decided to speak because I sure as hell knew Evan wouldn't.
        "So what made it-- was it my fault?  Of course it was my fault, I always mess shit up."
         "No-- no it's not like-- well kinda-- but no-- I just-- I don't like fighting." Evan stammered.
         "And I fought with Larry so it was my fault."
         "Connor-- it was-- it just-- I-- sorry."
         "Why are you sorry?  I should be sorry."
         "Just because-- nevermind.  I just don't like being near f-- fights or yelling.  It's-- it's fine though."
         "Hey, are you guys alright?" Alana asked as she barged into my room, Jared following her.  I hated it when people didn't knock before coming in, but I didn't bother to say anything to Alana as she sat down next to me.  Jared sat on the other side of Evan.
      "We're fine," I replied, still slightly agitated at the fact they didn't knock.  Evan nodded before focusing on his knee again.  "What happened with dinner?"
       "Well your Mom told us it was okay to go check on you guys so here we are," Jared answered.  I glanced at Evan then back at Jared. 
       "We could bring our food up here if you want, Evan-- as long as no one makes a mess." That last part was directed at Jared who shrugged in response.
        "You-- you don't have to-- sorry-- I--" Evan avoided eye contact as he spoke.
        "Okay we're going to bring food up here," I insisted and stood up, gesturing for Jared and Alana to follow me.
         I completely tuned out my parents as we went downstairs.  I simply grabbed Evan's dish, leaving Alana and Jared to get their own, and walked back up the stairs, careful not to drop Evan's food as Jared and Alana followed.  Evan was still on my bed when we entered my room again.  I handed him his plate and sat on the floor with my back against my bed.  Alana sat beside me and Jared of course sat in the rolling chair.
         "Nope, get off the chair, Kleinman," I protested.
         "I won't fall off of it again.  See the last time was a test, I was seeing how far I could lean back without it tipping over.  Now I know when it will tip so I just won't lean that far back," Jared argued.
         "Whatever."
        "C— Connor, where's your food?" Evan asked, changing the subject.
        "I left it downstairs, I'm not hungry."
        "You said that before but then you ate all my pretzels," Alana stated.
        "Maybe I was hungry before, but I'm definitely not hungry now."
        "Connor, what did you eat today?" Alana questioned.
        "That's none of your business."
        "You should eat, Murphy.  Food is good," Jared added.  "Without food I would die.  Like I would actually die.  No one could live without food."
        "Exactly," I murmered quietly.
        "What?" Alana's eyes widened out of concern.  Shit, she heard me.
         "Nothing."
         "Connor you can't just star—" She started.
        "Shut up, I can do what I want and it's not of your concern," I hissed, I didn't need these people to worry about me.  I don't even worry about me.
         "Connor come on, what did you eat today?" Alana prodded.
         "Well, I had a bag of pretzels and some of that shitty pasta my mom made."
         "Y— you only ate one bite, I was sitting next to you," Evan piped up.
         "So?"
         "Dude, you have to eat," Jared said.
         "I don't have to do anything I don't feel like doing."
         "When was the last time you ate a decent meal?" Alana's voice was full of worry.  I had to take a few moments to think about that.
        "I think I ate a slice or two of pizza a few days ago for dinner," I admitted.
       "Connor, you have to eat something right now!" She scolded.
       "I've been drinking water, I'm fine.  People water-fast and it actually has health benefits," I retorted.
       "That's true." Jared chimed.
       "Yeah, but to do that you have to drink a ton of water in replacement for each meal and you can't diet like that for long."
       "Whatever, I'm fine.  You're not going to make me eat because I'm not hungry and that's that." I turned around and glanced at my clock.  "Alright, it's getting late you guys should go."
       "Not until you eat," Alana objected.
       "I'll eat tomorrow," I lied.  There was no point in eating at this point.  If I ate a lot I would just end up throwing it up moments later.  My body can go a while without eating and I don't care if it's healthy or not.  Alana sighed, knowing that her argument was going nowhere and just gave up.
        "Fine, you better eat tomorrow." She told me.  I walked all three of them downstairs and after they brought their plates to the sink, I guided them to the door.
        "Bye." I held open the door for them as they walked out and said their goodbyes back.
       "Please eat," Evan pleaded as he walked by me.  I closed the door behind them and ran to my room, hoping Larry would spare me from yet another lecture.