*Connor’s POV*
I’m not proud of what I did, god I hate myself every second for it. I know I don’t deserve Alex’s or Ava’s forgiveness but I will never stop trying.
Ava would never stop me from seeing Alex, she couldn’t find it in herself to even stop anyone from seeing him.
The past year has been a mess, after that night with Lexi I got into a big fight with James, he got a plane straight to Ava. He was smart enough to stay with her and help her, I owe him for that.
The boys don’t speak to me much anymore, the only phone calls I get from them is to inform me on the band stuff, they ditched me basically but I don’t blame them.
Lexi didn’t want to speak to me either, Brad had told her about my marriage and child and now she thinks I’m a sick twisted person for doing that to my family.
I know this was my entire fault but I’m still hurting. I love Ava, I’ve been with many girls since her, it’s to try and replace that empty feeling in my chest.
I've cried, and you'd think I'd be better for it, but the sadness just sleeps, and it stays in my spine the rest of my life.
I hate living like this, I need to get myself out of this bubble of sadness and focus on moving upwards.
I’ve been thinking a lot recently and maybe I could move back to England, be closer with Alex. Maybe then he could start to forgive me and we could move on with life?
It’s hard to imagine things how they could be if I hadn’t of screwed up. I ruined the band and my relationship. How stupid can I get?
I’m going to move. I’m going to win back my wife and have my family back, I need to.
YOU ARE READING
Brave| Connor Ball
Fanfiction"I know you're lonely. I think you need someone to want you, well I do want you. So be brave, and want me back" Every day seems the same to me. I sit around and think about how alone I feel, then I wind up rather enjoying loneliness because it's the...
