Break Free [Stray Kids AU]

Chapter 4: Emotions

I stared at Felix thinking of how I can explain this mess. "It's a new mission, yes, but it's not by the Big Boss. It's made by me," I said. Felix started at me blankly still confused. "It's a plan to get the hell out of this hellhole," I continued. "Promise me Lix, you won't tell anyone okay?"  I stressed. He stared at me like I was delirious or something. Send me help to break it to this adorable boy who is a day younger than me okay. "Get out? Why would we leave?" Sht. No Felix no. "Because I've had enough. I've killed enough no scratch that WE'VE KILLED ENOUGH FELIX. Trust me I feel like my head is in hell already. I want you to know that I just want what's best for us." He was silent for a minute. "But they'll kill us if we escape Jisung." He was right and that did cross my mind, but i would sooner accept death than accept spending the rest of my life like this. "I know but they're scared of us right?" I could tell Felix was scared but I knew that if I wanted this plan to succeed, I needed his help. "Should we tell Chan hyung though?" He said and I shook my head. "No not yet. My plan isn't finished yet." "Can I take a look at the blueprint?" I nodded and showed him the blueprint. "So we can have Seungmin hack into the CCTVs to shut it and we can go to these emergency exits. I snuck out one night to check these exits and most of them are locked so I want to ask your help to lockpick those. I still don't know where those exits lead us but I want to try someday. I have a vague idea on where it could take us because at the back of this building there's the EXIT sign. So maybe these paths lead there. I checked the back and there aren't much CCTVs but there are guards around 5 of them roaming around. If the rest agree to help us, we could take them, together, as a team. You're the best spy here Lix and if I want to succeed in this I would want you to help me plan and then we can tell the boys."

We were talking about the plans that we would take and then the door opened I put the blanket over the blueprint, learning from my past mistakes and it was Chan hyung. "Hey Felix can I talk to Jisung alone?" Chan asked, hesitantly. Felix looked at me before getting up and walking out. "You okay?" Chan asked as he sat where Felix was. "Fine," I replied. "Jisung I'm worried about you," Chan told me. "You're getting too emotionally involved in our missions, you can't let your feelings get in the way," He continued. I looked at him in disbelief, how could I not let my feelings get in the way when I was killing people?? "I know what you're feeling," Chan continued. "No, I don't think you do Chan!" I exclaimed, slamming my first on the bed. "Jisung-" Chan was taken aback by outburst. "YOU AND THE BOYS ARE THE ONLY FAMILY I HAVE LEFT! BUT I CAN'T TAKE SEEING YOU GUYS COMMIT MURDER AFTER MURDER WITHOUT EVEN AN OUNCE OF REGRET I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!" I screamed, at this point, I realized I needed to stop talking, before I exposed my plan. "What do you mean?" He asked me, he had gotten up from where he was sitting at this point. "Nothing," I replied quickly. "Just leave me alone," I told him, looking away from him as tears threatened to spill from my eyes, I can't let him see me cry, I have to be strong, strong enough to get us out of here. I stared at the door the moment Chan left. I feel so tired and exhausted because I want this plan to work. I want my family out of this, I never felt wanted until these boys showed me that they truly cared. These boys showed me the affection I was longing for and I want them to be in a good place. No more murder, no more mission, no more manipulation, no more punishment, only good things that we can do. Felix poked his head in from the doorway "You okay mate?" He asked me, I could hear the concern in his voice. "Im fine, thanks Lix," I replied as I started lacing up my shoes. "Where are you going?" He asked, the concern still evident in his voice. "I have to scout out the exits." I said, jumping to my feet. "I'm coming," Felix stated. "No," I shut down his idea quickly, if something happened to Felix because of me, I would never forgive myself. "It's too dangerous to go alone," He replied. "I would never forgive myself if something happened to you," I gripped his shoulders, staring into his eyes, I could see he was worried about me. "You always say, we're a team," He used my own words against me. "And that's why I need you here, in case anything happens to me, you can continue this, I want you guys to live a happy life Felix," I sighed. "Please Jisung, let me come with you, I'm the best damn spy in this whole damn facility, I can help!"

He tried to convince me. I know he means well but if we get caught I can't let him take any blame for my plans. On the other hand, his lockpick skills would be useful. Can I really put him in harm's way for this? I looked at Felix, and in that split second, I made my decision. I took a deep breathe "Felix-"

Should Jisung...

LET FELIX COME WITH HIM
OR
TELL FELIX TO STAY IN THE DORMS