Of June

1- Among My Frivolous Thoughts

May 31st, 2011, is what I like to call the last ordinary day of my life.

"Maddie! Would you please stop listening to music and make some effort to come down? Dinner's ready."

Amidst the beats that reverberate in my ears, I hear mom shouting from the kitchen, manifesting such power that we both knew I couldn't just ignore her calling and make an excuse to cover it up. Since I'm not hungry, I hesitate to even get up, let alone go downstairs to the dining table. Maybe if I turn up the volume, it won't do any -

"Don't even pretend to listen to music, I know you can hear me. Five more minutes of excuses and I'll take away that headset you have."

. . .harm. I gulp.

Removing the headphones from my head and winding up everything properly, I keep the thing on a table placed beside my bed. It's a rather small desk, the wood of which always makes a creaky sound if you keep anything on it that is heavier than one book.

"Coming!" I reply back, not sure if she heard it or not. I just sit on my bed after that, mindlessly taking a look at my bedroom wall and wondering about nothing but the start of summer holidays for when my family has planned a few outings and visits to the states- same old, same old. Tomorrow is the last day of school before vacations begin, not to mention that I'm too un-thrilled, if I may make up a word, for what experience these holidays can possibly offer me. My eyes land upon the clock hanging on my bedroom wall. 8:30 p.m.

So I get up and descend down the stairs, sniffing the sweet scent of pancakes pouring out from the kitchen. I rush down the stairs like a ninja but soon realise that it wasn't a good idea, at all, because all that happens is my foot slips on one of the stairs and find myself lying on the hard ground.

It would be an absolute shame for all ninjas if I were one.

Mom and dad come rushing from the kitchen after the enormous thumping I made to find me struggling. I feel as if all the gravity of this whole universe has been concentrated above my foot. I groan in pain as dad tries to lift me up, a shake of head being mom's response.

"Can't believe you're almost fifteen. Are you hurt?" Mom asks fretfully while dad -well, ladies and gentlemen - is trying to control his unnecessary grin.

"I'll be careful next time." I mumble with a sigh.

Dinnertime is quite a quiet episode initially. All three of us eat in silence, occasionally making the usual crockery clatter and chewing sounds. With every swallow of food I secretly hope for mom or dad to not ask questions regarding my plans for the vacation, because that means I'll say 'no' like I do every year. The funny part is that they know all I like doing during my holidays is just stay at home, mind my own business, watch movies and empty the fridge. Even despite all this I'm always dragged into some or the other sort of 'family' gathering of family members I only see once a year, thanks to my ever-so-considerate parents.

Mom clears her throat.

Oh no.

"Maddie, uh. . .", she begins with a warm smile, "Tomorrow is your last day of school, right? I've been wondering if you'd come along, you know, it's been years since we last met Aunt Sophie. The kids would be happy, too."

You mean my aunt who has two little brats and a third cousin who always makes fun of everything I do or say? Sure, I'd love to!

Reluctantly, I decide against blurting these words in front of them.

"What's the point of it? I'm smarter than them anyways. I'm happy with Amelia and I don't need anyone else to talk to." I say, quickly realising the vainness of the sentence before sighing heavily. "I know we're gonna go even if I say no." I shrug, wishing they see the mild frustration I'm hiding behind a half-hearted smile, wishing them to stop asking me to go out and make more friends who're eventually going to disperse into separate ways in the end. I wish they knew I'm sick of it.