What You Left Behind

Ch. 23} Saying Goodbye

Erikas POV
Today is the day that I am finally going to announce whats going on. I'm really nervous for how fans will react. We also havent told them about the baby either, we've been trying to keep everything secret from people. I get Jake and he helps me set things up. We make sure the girls are occupied so there are no interruptions during the video. When everything is ready we start the camera. I sigh and intro the video. I wasn't as bubbly as usual so obviously fans are gonna know something is up right when they start watching it.

Erika: so we have Jake here with me, and we need to have a big talk, like, huge!

I take a deep breath and Jake grabs my hand, this made me less nervous and I went on.

Erika: we recently found out some news, as you know I was pregnant. I went to the doctors and they told me I had miscarried. There is a reason behind it though, which is the other thing. I have some type of disease and it's-

I pause trying to stop myself from crying, Jake puts his hand on my cheek and kisses me. I kiss back and I smile at him.

Erika: it's slowly killing me....

By this point I couldn't hold it any longer, I started sobbing and Jake hugged me and comforted me. He rubbed my back and kissed my forehead. I think he had started crying too, I could feel the way he was breathing and he was. After a while I wiped my face and resumed the video.

Erika: so *sniffles* I don't know what the next few days have in store for me, I don't know what we're going to do, but just know that I love you guys so freaking much and I just want to thank you for being such loyal fans through this journey on Youtube. I outro the video and the girls come up to me.

Rose: mommy, are you ok?
Erika: yes baby, mommy is ok

I grabs her chin and just admire her, I'm going to miss these cute faces. I kiss her forehead and hug her, she snuggles up to me and I just take it all in. What are they going to think of this? Paisley comes and sits with us and we watch a Disney movie together.

-Time Skip three days-