Pain Reconciled by Love

The End

(Written before I tried to take my life in December, 2017.)

My tears have filled a thousand glasses,

From all the pain I've endured.

No one knows the severity of the masses,

Or destruction of the completely impure.

You were my light, and my purpose,

Until it all became undone.

Now I cannot be amidst,

The falling and agonizingly fretted fun.

How could I have let it become broken,

When it was all so bruised and bent.

Already I've turned away lost kin,

So, it won't matter when it's spent.

My eyes may seem defenseless,

You'd be right if you said they were green.

For years, I thought they were brown, and careless.

I was right on one part, forever unclean.

My green eyes show fear now.

They tell a story of love, and then lust.

Then I ate too much crow,

And fell down the path lined with rust.

If You ever cared, You wouldn't leave,

When I needed You the absolute most.

Can't You show me a sign of reprieve?

Or, will I just become a ghost?

I needed truth, I needed life.

But all You gave me was a destiny to die.

What is the point of it all, this strife?

Why are we all fated to cry?

No one lives a life of happiness.

Humans are masked in counterfeit.

I will never regret again, it's bliss.

All my feelings will soon split.

No one ever cared or loved for real.

It's all just words—the actions are what matter.

I learned that from my future, which could've been sealed.

Now, he may have to turn the latter.

All apologies—I shared, but never heard.

Repentance would have been nice,

The penitence of the purest words.

Here's my last advice:

Don't give up like I did.

I wasn't meant to live past two decades.

But you can, I believe in you, kid.

And now, it's time, for the last curtain to fade.