Oh. My. Fate?! (BL, Volume 6)

116 I've Only Ever Wanted You

Qiu Ling's lips twitched. So hestill ranked behind Madam Zhong in his beloved's heart ...

Seeing his gaze, Jing Yi couldn'thelp but laugh. "You're looking so down. Don't tell me youreally mind it so much?"

Qiu Ling's expression blanked."Did you ... Did you just tease me?"

Jing Yi stopped laughing and lookedaway as if he suddenly felt uncomfortable. Qiu Ling's gazeflickered. Could it be ... Was this Jing Yi warming up to him again?Was he already reconsidering his decision even though he didn'tknow the whole truth yet?

Qiu Ling reached out and gently tookhis hand. Jing Yi wanted to draw back but when Qiu Ling didn't letgo, he paused and looked up at him.

"Qiu Ling ..."

"That ... That you broke upwith me, that didn't really have to do with that Yu Jin, had it?"

Jing Yi stared at him in a daze. Howhad he suddenly ...

"It is something else.Something that happened in the secret realm but it wasn't relatedto him."

"I —"

"You don't have to say it."Qiu Ling rubbed the back of his hand with his thumb and smiled. "Itold you I wouldn't pressure you. If you don't want to be withme, then I won't bother you. I will just ... quietly stay at yourside. I'm alright with that. In case you ever reconsider ... I'llbe there. And I'll still be there if you don't. Even if you don'tthink that way, in my opinion, us being together is fate."

"Qiu Ling." Jing Yi'sgaze grew gentler.

Qiu Ling didn't wait for hisanswer though. He patted his hand and slid closer. "Alright,let's not talk about this for now. Let's take a look at your soulfirst. Making sure that you're alright is the most important."

"Mn. Thank you."

"Don't mention it." QiuLing brushed his hair back with a smile. "Then ... Could I ...hold you?"

"Ah?"

"I mean ..." Qiu Linglooked up at the sky. "Dragons are quite good at this but ...it's still difficult to do. I can't guarantee that you won'tfeel any pain at all and we can't let you recoil or I mightaccidentally injure you so ... It would be best if you could just ..."He stopped talking and tightened his lips.

Alright, this totally sounded as ifhe wanted to take advantage of Jing Yi. Mn, maybe he actually wantedto take advantage of him but it wasn't like his words weren'ttrue. Holding him in his arms would make this easier.

Jing Yi examined Qiu Ling's face.It seemed ... he was serious about this? "Well, if it's betterthat way ..." He slid closer, his heart speeding up. He couldn'thelp but look up at those dark eyes and his breath caught. Was thisreally alright? Wouldn't that make things even more difficult? Butthis was something that had to be done. He couldn't refuse ...

He reached out and his fingertipstouched Qiu Ling's chest, feeling the smooth surface of his robe.They both gulped. Qiu Ling gently took his wrist and pulled himcloser, their breath mixing while they still held each other'sgaze.

The closer he got, the faster hisheart beat and Jing Yi's cheeks couldn't help but flush. He hadthought he understood what love was after remembering Tian but rightnow, he felt that maybe the difference between him in this life andhim in his past life had simply been their age.

When Qiu Ling approached him backthen he had merely been fifteen, hardly old enough to understand whatwas going on. The year after that had been spent getting to know eachother and then there had been the time in the Hei Dian Sect where hefelt like things were moving faster, going in another direction, adirection he didn't know and was still a little hesitant toexplore.

He certainly had never felt thiskind of feeling in proximity to Qiu Ling while his previous selfseemed to have felt it a lot of times when he was with Tian. But thenagain his past self had been older than him. And now, after fiveyears had passed while he was in the secret realm, he suddenly feltthat he could comprehend very well what had been happening with himin his past life. This kind of attraction ... was a little differentfrom the one he had felt for Qiu Ling before.

Qiu Ling waited. He wanted to seewhat Jing Yi would do. Whether he would decide for him here and now.Unfortunately, Jing Yi just stared at him, his gaze torn betweenconfusion and longing.

Qiu Ling finally couldn't take itany longer. He leaned over, his warm breath caressing Jing Yi'sskin. He raised a hand, cupped his cheek and finally, their lips metin a short kiss. They broke apart a few moments later, both of themlowering their gazes, unable to look each other in the eye for now.

"We shouldn't do this."

"You make it sound as if wewere hurting somebody. There's just us."

"No, I —"

"Sh." Qiu Ling pressed afinger against Jing Yi's lips when he wanted to bring up the personhe loved. At this moment, he definitely didn't want to hear it."It's alright. Just treat it ... as me being unruly and notrespecting your boundaries if you feel the need to justify."

Jing Yi looked up at him, his gazeflickering. "You've lived for so long. Have you never feltunsure about how to proceed? Was there never a time when you didn'tknow what you wanted?"

Qiu Ling shook his head. "I'veonly ever wanted you." He pulled Jing Yi into his arms andhushed him when he wanted to speak up. "Don't. I know you'reunsure. Even if you don't say it, I can feel that. I've known youlong enough, after all. So just take your time and find out what youtruly want. I'll be here until that moment and even afterward. Fornow, let's really take care of your soul."