Unsaid Words

In Mourning

The moment Seb came home, he collapsed onto the floor, letting tears break his dam down. He curled arms over his head, as if this would protect him from his sadness.

This was why Jim had never said it first. Seb had just been an afterthought to him. Useless. Idiotic. Pathetic.

Seb crawled to the fridge, tears stinging in his eyes, and opened it, searching for some form of alcohol. Anything that might make him forget everything. Forget how shitty Seb felt. Forget Jim. Maybe if Seb got drunk enough, he'd fall over somewhere and get amnesia. God, that would feel so good. To forget everything about Jim.

Seb found a half-empty bottle of vodka at the back of the fridge. He drank the rest straight from the bottle, not bothering to get a shot glass. He slumped against the wall, forgetting about the open fridge.

A new wave of sadness rolled over himself at how pathetic he must've
looked. Fresh tears rolled down his cheeks. Seb shook with sobs, spilling a bit of vodka on the carpet without noticing.

Seb hated the idea that Jim wasn't going to come and help him. No one knew he was here. But someone was close by who could help. Severin.

Seb didn't bother to call Severin beforehand. His depressed and intoxicated brain didn't even think of it as an option. All his energy was put into remembering Severin's address and walking there on his own.

Seb knocked heavily on Severin's door. He was greeted by a faintly familiar face. Later, Seb would remember him as being Severin's flatmate, Scott.

"Is Severin here?" Seb asked.

"You his brother?" Scott asked.
Seb nodded.

"Andrew!" Scott called to someone behind him. "Where do Rich and Sev live again?"

Andrew shouted something back that Seb couldn't hear.

"He moved out a couple months ago," Scott explained to Seb. "You want me to drive you there? I can tell you've had a bit to drink, mate."

"Sure," Seb said, suddenly realizing how loud he was talking.

"C'mon," Scott said, throwing a jacket on and guiding him down the stairs and to a car parked outside.

Scott drove without a word, not asking any questions. He parked outside of a flat building, gave Seb the number, and drove away.

Seb regretted not wearing a jacket, as the cold was beginning to hack into his exposed skin. He found Severin's flat and knocked on his door.

He heard a whispered "oh shit" inside and a hurried scuffling.

The door was opened a few moments later by a slightly ruffled-looking Severin.

"Hey, Seb," Severin said. "What...?"

Seb started sobbing again, as he had been choking it back for the entire car ride there.

"Come in," Severin said sympathetically. He pulled Seb inside and sat him down on the couch. He grabbed some tissues from the corner table and handed them to Seb.

"What happened?" Severin asked.

"Jim..." Seb choked.

"I'll kill him for you if he cheated on you," Rich said, sitting by him as he tied a dressing gown.

Seb shook his head, new tears coming.
Severin rubbed his back.

Seb knew what he was doing. It was something their mom used to do to get them to talk to her before she passed away.

"Jim..." Seb started again, hitting a brick wall in his mind. He started crying again.

"What'd he do?" Rich asked.