Night in the Ruts

Fifth Grade Black Belt - Steven

I left her.  I left her sitting there in her room.  I left her.  I.  Left.  Her.  How could I do that?  Why did I do that?  Well, I mean I know why, but why?  I can't even use the excuse of I didn't have a choice.  You know why I can't use it?  Because I did have a choice.  And I clearly made the wrong one.

        But would I be thinking the same thing if the situation were flip-flopped?  If Annie were the one I left sitting there?  Would I wish that it could've been Charlie?

        I don't know.

        Nobody knows I did it yet, except Charlie of course.  I never went home that night.  I didn't have a rehearsal and I didn't eat dinner.  Where did I go?  Of all places I went to Annie's.

        Her mom answered the door, very confused.  Of course I couldn't tell her what I'd just done because, well, she's Annie's mom!  Yeah hi, uh, I just broke up with my girlfriend–no, not Annie.  I was cheating on her.  Yeah, could I come in?  As you can tell, that wouldn't work.  Especially with Annie's mom.  "Hey, missus C.," I said with a sigh.

        One thing about Annie's mom: She is the absolute definition of Mom.  She cooks like no other, she doesn't take nonsense, and she's just... A mom.

        That's why, when Annie's mom saw how down I was, she let me inside and gave me a hug and offered me some leftover dinner.  I didn't have an appetite.  The broken shards of my heart were kind of filling my stomach–metaphorically speaking, of course.  Anyway, one thing led to another and eventually I was on her couch with a pillow and a blanket.  I really didn't want to go back to the apartment and face the guys... Especially Annie.  I don't think I can even look her in the eyes right now.

        But I couldn't stay at her apartment forever, so I left the following morning.  I had to tell Mrs. C. that the band kicked me out of the apartment, but that I figured I should go talk to them and straighten things out.  She bought it and I was on my way.

--

"Steven!" Joey said loudly.

        Annie jumped up from the couch and ran over to me.  That's weird.  I didn't even see her on the couch.  All I see is–oh.  Of course.  Joe.

        So anyway, Annie ran over to me and asked where I was after she kissed me.  I searched for a lie that seemed valid.  I had been gone for over twenty-four hours at this point (so maybe I didn't go home right away...).  "I was... Sunapee with family," I said with a smile.  I feel horrible.  Believe me, it's taking a lot not to go back to Charlie's house right now and tell her the truth.

        I don't know why I lied to her in the first place.  I guess I was hoping that by making it seem like I wasn't happy that it would reflect badly on me and not her, whereas cheating would make it seem like it was her bad–like she was boring or something.  And lemme tell you, she wasn't at all.

        Annie frowned at my response, but didn't think much of it.  She tugged on my hand, dragging me into the circle of Aerosmith.  Literally.  They were leaning forward in their chairs, talking avidly about God knows what, but Joe and Brad had their guitars and I now realized that Annie had her harmonica in her hand.  "C'mon," she said, still pulling me to sit next to her.  Of course she was sandwiched between Joe and me.  "We wanna show you this!"

        So they started playing this funky bluesy thing.  Under different circumstances, I would've probably been down with it, scatting the lyrics up and down.  But it was a happy tune and all I could think about was how love isn't a one way street.  It's two.  And if you're crossing, you're gonna get hit by a fast moving heavy semi truck.