Alchoholic lips.

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I've been feeling so bad lately

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I've been feeling so bad lately. It's been almost half a month since the boys left for their world tour and I could say it was taking a toll  on me.

I  neede a break from reality. I was definetely overworking  myself, skipping lunches everything. I was feeling really weak lately. Also Taehyung and I haven't been skyping as frequently lately because he is busy with shows as they added more tour dates and by the time he is done I am either asleep or at work.

We've been texting but not that much. I can understand that he is working ahrd so it's not a big deal but I could definetelyy tell that we were drifting apart.

I was at my office when I heard a knock on my door. I left my eyes from my computer screen only to be met with Lizzy's.

"Hey giirrl'She said cheerfully.

"Hey." I greeted her as she took a seat at my couch.

"What time are you fnishing work?" She asked me.

"I don't know maybe 11?" I said.

"I was thinking why not go for some drinks tonight? The company is having a big party  to celebrate one month since it opened." She said and I smiled at her suggestion.

" Why not?" I asked her.

"Great " She said smiling.

"Why don''t you come by my house to get ready together?" I asked her.

"Okay I'll wait for you to finish your work. I'll ask the boss if he'll let us earlier since it's the party today." Lizzy said excited as she left my office.

Nowadays I've been catching myself stumbling on articles for me and Taehyung's relationship.

They definetely have spotted us together. Me and taehyung needed to talk about this. I wasn't sure iff I wanted to text him or talk in person about this. For now I brush it off.

I kept looking at my phone. No sign from tae. Not even a single message. I sighed and continued my work.

I finally finished by 8 since that was the time our boss had set for everyone. Lizzy drove us to my apartment. 

I was searching through my closet for anything to wear when I saw a paper back. I looked inside of it and saw the black dress that I had bought when we went shopping with the boys.

I decided to wear that with some red heels. For hair I ade loose curls and for makeup I went simple just a winked eyeliner and red lipstick. I wore my coat on top while I got my black clutch.

"Wow guurl you look fine." Lizzy complimented me.

"Thank you." I said as i genuinely smiled after a long time of feeling depressed. I was looking at my reflexion on the mirror and I could see my skinny self through that dress. The change was visible . I wonder what my mum and dad would think of me but I just brushed it off.

Lizzy wore leather pants some heels and a white shirt with see-through sleeves. She was looking fine.

We left the apartment to go to the club where the ceremony was held.

We entered the club. I followed Lizzy who presented me to the other colleauges.

We ordered drinks and we chatted with the people around us. 

"Hey aren't you Taehyung's girlfriend from BTS?" A random guy asked me.

"Um yeah." I said and he took his phone out and motioned me to take a selfie with him.

I was having fun. I was checking up here and there my phone for any messages but they were none.

I kept drinking and drinking. I found comfort in drinking tonight.I could feel the impact the alchohol had on me.  I was enjoying the numbness of the alchohol. At this point I sat at the bar leaving  Lizzy's group of friends behind. 

"One margarita please." I oredered and the barman proceeded to make it.

I was so deep in my thoughts that I hadn't realised that someone had joined me.

"Isn't it such a pity for such a beautiful lady to be drinking alone?" A guy said snapping me out of my thoughts.

When I didn't respond he said something alse.

"What is your name?" He asked me.

"Emily. Yours?" I asked him.

"Jung." He said as he placed a kiss on my hand which made me smiled and he smirked.

He was tall and handsome. His hair were dark brown. He was wearing a black shirt and black pants. Also his cologne reminded me of Tae. He Himself reminded me of Tae. Ow how I miss Tae.

By this time I was so drunk I was seeing Taehyung in every guy I met.

I kept looking at him smiling.

"Am I that handsome?" He asked me and I smiled.

I nodded.

He came closer and I didn't get back I was enjoying this. I was getting Taehyung's vibes out of this guy.

"You look like a lot like..." I didn't fisnish my sentence when he placed his finger on my lips.

"Shhh." He said and I smiled. Taehyung used to do that when I wouldn't shut up about something or he would kiss me.

At this point I couldn't control myself and I brought my lips on his. It felt like it was Taehyung. When he slipped his tongue on my mouth I could tell it wasn't him but I couldn't stop myself.

"EMILYYY?" I heard Lizzy yell which snapped me out of it.

I looked at the guy with wide eyes realising what I have done.

Tears started streaming down my face. How could I be this reckless?

I was crying frozen in place.

"Emily? Are you okay?" Lizzy said softly.

"Take me out of here. Please." I cried.

"Yeah let's go"She said as she rushed to take her things.

The ride back home was silent. I couldn't bring myself to even face Lizzy.

I was feeling so guilty. Tears wouldn't stop streaming down my face.

"It can stay between us." She said as she stopped the engine in fron of my apartment.

"I'm such an idiot." I said starting to hit my head.

"Emily. EMILY PLEASE STOP." LIzzy said taking a hold of my hands.

"Lizzy. I messed everything up."I cried like a little baby and she hugged me.

"Emily. Emily look at me. It wasn't your fault. You weren't thinking straight. I bet Taehyung will understand." She said while stroking my hair.

"I'm afraid. I'm afraid I ruined everything. " I cried harder.

After seeing me like this she decided to spend the night in my apartment.

That night I cried myself to sleep.

Taehyung please forgive me.

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