Saved || Jesse Rutherford ||

The Date (Final Part)

I felt as if something lit up inside of me...And I wanted more!

~~~~~~~~~

I broke the kiss and took a step back, flabbergasted by my actions.

"I-I..", I began but could not find the words.

Tyler raised his fingers to my lips, signaling for me to stay silent. He took a stepped forward and grabbed my face delicately. He leaned down and laid a sweet kiss to my lips.

They were so soft and left me wanting more. He retreated his head only about a few inches, making our foreheads touch.

I stared into his icy blue irises. They were filled with love and admiration... For me...

I stood there breathless, trying to process everything. I opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out. "Yet again..."

"Ava..No please. I know what you're going to say. You're going to push me away again. And I won't let that happen...Truth is I like you, Ava....A lot...And I know you do to."

The air was knocked out of my lungs. It felt as if Earth suddenly lost all oxygen. I could not breathe. All this that Tyler was confessing was just too much. "Jesse", I thought. Tears begin to form...I was on the brim of breaking down...I felt weak...I didn't know why.

"Because deep down you know it's true...You do have feelings for Tyler. And you know damn well you can't pursue them...", said my inner conscience. I shook my head trying to get those thoughts out of my head.

"No, no, no", I said trying to convince him...It came out sounding as if I was trying to convince myself.

"You do...I know you do...I can't be the only one that felt that...when you..Kissed me", he said stepping forward. I responded with a step backward.

"That..That was an accident... This can't happen..It can't!"

He took a step towards me again. "Why not Ava? Why? Why can't you just follow your heart. I won't hurt you...I would never hurt you."

I stepped backwards for the upteenth time but only ended up backing into a tree. I felt cornered. I felt as if the world was spinning. I felt the stinging pain of guilt deep in my stomach.

Tyler took a step forward until there was no more space between his body and I. He lifted his hands and cupped my face. There was no escaping.

"Ava..Look me in the eyes and tell me you do not have feelings for me...Not even the tiniest bit. Tell me that I'm crazy for ever thinking I had a chance with you...Tell me how much of a fool I am...Tell me this", he said gesturing between us, "is not real...And I'll leave you alone. I won't ever bother you ever again."

"Yeah tell him Ava...You know you won't...You very well, as much as I know, that you do", my conscience repeated, mocking me.

I opened my mouth to tell him. I wanted to say everything. I wanted to tell him how much of a fool he is, how crazy he is, how insane the idea of him and I are. I wanted to...No I needed to...But I couldn't..

Looking into his eyes, I saw how much hope he had for us. I saw how much feelings he has for me...How adoration, admiration, love, and lust he had towards me. I saw all that, and more...I also saw my reflection. And what I saw terrified me...I saw myself staring deep into his eyes with the same emotions he felt reflected. I adored Tyler. I admired him... I may even love him... All wanted for as long as I could remember was someone to care for me...I never had that. I never had someone who valued my safety. I thought I had it with Jesse, but now standing here think about it; I didn't... He is a criminal. He is a psychopath...Whether he commited the crime or not can be debated. Bottom line is, he has never told me the full story of what happened that night. He never told me his connection to Tyler nor his aunt.  I don't even know his favorite color! How can I feel safe around such a person?