Dancing With The Devil

Chapter 46

Alistair remained heavily medicated for several days and it felt like those were the hardest days of my life. They would allow the drugs to wear off so he could eat some solid food and drink water instead of getting all of his nutrients through the IV and to see how he was faring. It seemed like the best idea at the time, but each time he would wake up he would let out a hiss of pain and look around desperately, prepared for all kinds of awful danger. His body would jerk and jostle as he tried to get a bearing on where he was. His mother and father would leap into action right away, soothing him until he allowed himself to breathe and I would sit far away, knowing I would only push unwanted memories on him.

We shared a few words after he had woken up entirely. I would gently touch one of his hands and he would tell me how grateful he was that I was okay and he would relax further when I told him that Sophie was okay too, that Jasper had saved her. But it was always fleeting. He was frequently exhausted and they would put him under to have the cycle start again in a few hours.

I felt compelled to stay with him at the beginning but it became very clear that this was going to be a long process. And a wildly painful one at that. Some would argue that Alistair needed me more than ever in those moments when he woke up completely haunted by the events. But it became obvious that it was not my place. Alistair's family was beyond lovely and accommodating to me, not complaining when I insisted I sleep there for the first night and then the second. They always acknowledged me in conversation and made sure that I was fed and as comfortable as I could be in a hospital room. Plus, it kept me close to Sophie which only made me want to stay more.

And, if I was being entirely honest, I was a little terrified of the outside world now. Not only had I survived something terrible many people seemed to think that I was guilty. Though the camera had cleared me of that I knew that many people would never be able to see Josh as the monster that he truly was. I wasn't prepared to face all the judgment but I doubted I would ever be.

Though, after a few attempts, it seemed that Alistair was remembering that danger was not imminent he still would become more anxious and more upset when his gaze fell upon me. And seeing him so terrified with clear damage still marking his face and body I would struggle to hold back a torrent of tears. Even so, the Kingsley family always encouraged me to stay until about the third day in.

"Come on, I think it's time for you to go home." Jasper stated bluntly.

I blinked my bleary eyes several times before staring up at him. My body was aching madly from spending so long in the god forsaken arm chair beside Alistair's bed but I refused to move. In fact, Jasper suggesting I move almost felt like a challenge.

"I'm not leaving him after everything." I replied tightly.

"Sophie gets released today." Jasper countered.

"Oh God, I almost forgot." I whispered, rubbing a hand over my face.

"She's going to need you almost as badly as you need a shower right now. And you need to start prepping for your court case. The camera proved that killing Josh was an act of self-defense but there are still plenty of events you need to make statements about. And your parents..."

"Let's go." I agreed.

I didn't want him to continue on. My main propriety was my best friend.

I couldn't go back to the condo. I thought it was untouchable after Josh or one of those following his orders had trashed the place so badly all those months ago. It had given me chills to be back there. I couldn't imagine how badly it would make my skin crawl now, after everything that had happened there. So I opted out and told Jasper to take me to one of the nicest hotels in downtown. Yes, a small space with reasonable security seemed like the best option.