Colors of pain

"Don't cry"

I look around me and everything was dark

Along with that my expressions are dull

For I'm doing my best not to cry

Don't cry I said to myself a hundred times

cause if I cry I feel like I'll go back from scratch

From the scratch where i used to cry everyday and pity myself

And ask myself these questions

Why am I like this? Why am I not pretty?

Am I not that worthy of a person?

I already do beyond my best why its still not enough?

Why does he have to leave me like this?

Those questions whom i cant answer

Those heartbreaking thoughts that shattered my heart more than I can imagine

Those sleepless crying nights

I dont want....

I dont want to go back from scratch

I dont want to suffer again

I dont want to hate myself again

I dont want to go back from scratch again!

So why?

why...

why

Why do you have to appear in front of me again?

Why do you have to break my heart effortlessly again?

I hate myselfI hate myself again

for I love you so much that all of my dedication and courage go to wastewith a single glimpse of you

With a single smile of yours

I look around me and everything was dark

And I found myself crying while telling myself not to cry a hundred times.