Colors of pain

"I don't want to become a monster"

It's already past midnight but here I am aimlessly wondering on the streets
With my mind clouded with thoughts
And with my heart full of pain and anger
I should be afraid of the goons wondering at the streets
But how come I'm more afraid of this little monster inside me
This little monster that eats me from time to time
This little monster that's made of pain and anger
This little monster that might eat me whole anytime
Anytime when I see my parents fighting
Anytime when I hear their voice
This little monster eats me little by little
While walking aimlessly I'm already crying before I know it
With questions that filled my mind
How come...
How come my parents voice bring me nightmares
How come that the sight of them terrifies me
Parents shouldn't be like this right?
They shouldn't bring their kids nightmares right?
The sight of them should make their kids relieved not terrified right?
So how come they bring me nightmares and fear
I don't want to be a monster
I said to myself while crying
So please...
Please stop fighting
Because if you guys continue this  I might not be able to stop my myself
I might not be able to fight be able to fight this monster inside me
Mom
Dad
I'm afraid
I'm afraid that one day this pain and anger eats me
I'm afraid that I will become a monster
Mom
Dad
Help me
I don't to become a monster that hates you guys
Because I love and tresure the both of you
I said to myself  while crying as if my parents could hear me
It's already past midnight but here I am aimlessly wondering on the streets
With my mind clouded with thoughts
And with my heart full of pain and anger
and before I knew the goons surrounded me
But it's strange because I'm still not afraid of them but Im rather afraid of this little monster inside me