Again

Chapter 24.

I can't do this. I can't stay at this house forever, while all my friends go off to College and explore the world. The words of Heather come to my mind again.

"Argh, you're just jealous Rapunzel, because mommy won't let you out."

What if I really won't get out of here again? My mother said that she's scared, that she's not too strong like Anne. What did she mean? Why would she be afraid of losing me? And who did she lose before? I was actually surprised that Anne defended me like that. I never heard her talk so intimate with my mother before. Although she doesn't come over as much as a normal friend would do, the conversation sounded pretty... Personal. They sounded like old friends, discussing the inappropriate behavior of their children.

And why would Anne consider doing the same thing to Harry? What would she get out of it?

It's pretty funny to think of Harry as a person who would stay at home instead of going out and partying the night through. Should I really go out with him on Friday? What is it exactly what we're doing on Friday anyway? Is it some kind of date or am I just being played with? I don't want to do anything stupid, but with Harry on my side I can't think clearly. All I can think about is him and nothing else. And I don't want him to have this kind of control over me. It's funny, before my birthday I never really had to worry about guys. I never had a boyfriend, so I had plenty of time to study and fulfill the requirements of my mother to make me a perfect daughter. But I also remember many fights, because first, even sleepovers weren't allowed. Thankfully Bob supported me in that manner. But going out is still a problem. So how would she even let me out on Friday? I'd like to ask Emma or Heather for help, but what would they think of me? Maybe, I first should decide if I even want to go. Maybe he will be nicer after today.

A shiver runs down my spine by even thinking of it. Suddenly, the heavy urge of finding all these secrets out don't pressure me as much as they did before.

The vibration of the phone signals me that it's usable again. I scroll through my address book and stop at Finn's name. Normally, I would call him and ask how he is. We would talk and I even would ask him for advice. But know it seem utterly stupid. He just broke our friendship as if it was nothing worth. A branch he broke in two half with his knee in a matter of seconds.

Huffing, I get up, taking my school bag along with me and taking out everything I need to study. First I open my planner and make a to do list. Studying is the only thing that can get my mind off of everything.

• • •

"Mia? You up?" someone asks, softly knocking on the door. I get up, opening the door to reveal my mother.

"Come in," I say quietly, my gaze falling to the floor as I sit back on my desk. "Did Anne leave?" I ask without looking up.

"Mhm," my mother mumbles. I turn around on the chair, watching my mother sitting on the edge of the bed. "I missed you at dinner."

"Yeah, I had a lot to study for," I lie, nervously playing with my fingers. On the one side I really want to talk with my mother about all the things I heard, but at the same time I'm wondering if it's even worth it. And if I maybe should've do it with Bob.

"I actually wanted to ask you something...“

My mother smiles. "Me, too. Should I go first or do you want to?"

"No, no. Go first," I giggle nervously. Coward.

She's looking just as nervous as I am, constantly rubbing the palm of her hands along her perfectly fitting pants. She's looking dressier than she has to, but she thinks, this is how you have to dress if you want to impress people. "So, Anne and me thought about the future for our kids and... what would happen after your graduation."

My face pales, but she goes on without noticing. "And I think we should start with online colleges. It would be a great opportunity for you and-"

"Opportunity for what? For me to stay home!?"

She frowns. "Well, I actually wanted to discuss this with you at Dinner, but Bob and I already picked some Colleges you should apply to. There is still enough time and you have perfect grades."

"I am aware, but this is not for you to decide."

"Amelia, not again. I'm your mother, I'm way older and wiser than you are and I know how the world works. I wish I would've done online college in your age...“

I stand up from the chair. Anger and anxiety push through my veins and down my legs. I can feel my muscle tense. "I am not you. I'm making my own decision, I am old enough!"

"Do not raise your voice on me young lady! What I say will be done, do you understand me!?" she practically yells at me. I can hear a door closing and surely after Bob is standing in the door frame.

I ignore his questioning expression and look directly at my mother. "You can't keep me here forever. I am sick of being your prisoner!''

"Amelia... you're not a prisoner. We love you, and we only want the best for you," Bob says, making his way next to my mother. My mouth drops as well as my hope.

"Are you serious? I thought that least you would support me in this! You always told me to go my own way!"

My mother sighs. "This is different. We do not own you an explanation. You're doing this, final," she says, and starting to walk out of my room. If it was any other situation I would've given up. But not with this. This is too important. And I won't give it up.

"No," I say, and my mother turns back around. "I'm not going to do what you want. I am old enough to make my own decision. I'm eighteen and I'm sick of you controlling my life. You're just trying to ruin mine, because you didn't get to live your own!"

Until now my anger was boiling, burning my insides, but when I now see Bob and my mother’s horrified expression, I start over thinking my own decision about going to college. Is it really worth fighting?

When I realize what I'm actually contemplating to do, I get angry again. I can't let them control my life forever. It's time I take matters into my own hands.

"I don't know when you became so disrespectful, but this stops now!"

''Mia, I think you should apologize to your mother."

I look at both of them, shocked. They don't understand, they don't get it into their heads. I can't live in this room forever! Suddenly, I'm really starting to feel like Rapunzel. "I already applied for Colleges. I am going. And none of you are going to stop me from finally getting the hell out of here."

I've gone too far, and I press the palm of my hand against my mouth in shock. I'm expecting anything now. Outburst, yelling, grounding. But instead they just turn away, walking out of the room and silently closing the door. For a moment I just stay still, before letting myself fall onto my chair. This is even worse than yelling. This is pure disappointment. I think I just made everything ten time worse.

• • • • • • •

A/N.: I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Please, please vote and comment! I love you all! XO