"Last night never happened, it was a dream, my mind was playing a prank on me in my sleep. That's all it was." Alex whispered to himself as he walked to school. The day was gonna be brutal, and he knew it. He could either hangout with his regular group and have them question who the kid was from the other day, or he could hang out with Jack and... never mind. Fuck school. Alex could just go to the park for 6 hours, no big deal. Better than facing reality. So with that in mind he was on his way. The fucking terrible part was he had to pass through the school ground to get there, but it was worth it. He made it all the way to the back of the school, past the big tree, when a voice made his heart stop.
"Alex Gaskarth it seems you forgot your glasses today." A women's voice called from behind, making the young male stop dead in his tracks.
"How so Mrs.Buttfuck?" Alex replied bitterly, slowly turning to face the old hag.
"It's Butuc. Watch your mouth Mr.Gaskarth. Now let me escort you to class like the king you are." She sneered, grabbing his shoulder.
"Mam, I consider this sexual harassment."
"Shut up Alex."
"That's verbal assault. I'm afraid I may have to report this to the principle." Alex teased, pushing the obviously angry women to her breaking point.
"Oh what a shame, looks like we're here, you know how I savor our time together Mr. Gaskarth." She said bitterly, slowly turning the door handle of his English class. "Hello students! Mr. Gaskarth has finally decided to bless you all with his presence..." Mrs. Butuc continued on, but Alex didn't hear past the first few words. His eyes were locked. Locked onto Jack. At the very back, his hair as untamable as ever. They stared at each other in shock, before Jack dropped his eyes onto his work like it was suddenly the most interesting thing in the world. Unfortunately for them, Mrs. Butuc noticed their gaze.
"Oh so you are familiar with our new friend Mr. Barakat here? Well it's his first full day here, and he doesn't know the curriculum very well, how 'bout you go take that empty seat beside him Alex dear." She chuckled darkly, watching Alex fidget uncomfortably, and Jack blushing a bright crimson.
"No, I'm good Buttfuck." The class burst into laughter, except of course the two males, dreading the teachers coming response.
"If you don't take that god damn seat you my friend are suspended." She growled in his ear maliciously. Alex walked down the middle of the class, past all the empty desks he longed to have. Beside anyone to be honest. Even clammy Kelly, the brace faced girl that couldn't even look at a guy without sweating like a bitch. But he just kept walking. He reached the seat and dropped his bag down beside it. Slumping in the chair he looked over at Jack, who was perched delicately on the furthest corner of his chair. It was almost funny. Almost.
"Hi." Jack mumbled, looking intently at something on the floor.
"Don't talk to me." Alex laughed "Pathetic faggot."
Jack's heart dropped. He knew this would happen. He knew someone would find out and just ruin everything for him. He finally had a chance to start new, and Alex Gaskarth was about to ruin it for him. Alex. The boy Jack thought he loved. That's right, Jack loved Alex. He didn't know why. He really shouldn't, all he had done was insult him. But something about him drew Jack in. Maybe it was his brownish-blond fringe that hung just shy of his eyes. Or maybe it was the soft chuckle he did when Jack said something stupid. He turned to look at him, just for a second, he promised himself he would look away before anyone saw. But Alex was already staring at him. Jacks stomach dropped. His face turned bright red. For the rest of the class, he kept his eyes on the board, never once looking away.
Mrs. Butuc knew Alex would try and skip off the rest of the day so after each period she made sure to be right outside his class, ready to guide the embarrassed boy through the crowded halls. Jack on the other hand was free to do what he pleased. He started toward his next class but something stopped him. What if his next class was with Alex? That mean teacher would make them sit together again. Could he suffer through that? No. He decided the best thing to do was to go home. And for Jack, home was the park bench. He made his way to the back of the school, and crossed the field Alex attempted to cut through just an hour before. He made it to the edge where the woods began. The park was in the very middle of the forest. It was a bit of a walk, but not too long. 15 minutes at most. The scenery was pretty at least. It was mid October. With every gust of wind, colourful tornadoes fell from the sky. the leaves on the ground crunched beneath Jacks feet. He tuned himself into the sounds of autumn to distract himself from the thoughts he knew would push the tears from his eyes. He didn't want to ruin the peace of nature, just because he was a useless piece of shit. He didn't even deserve to be here. No, he wasn't going to disturb anyone or anything with his pointless little tears.
He made it to his usual spot. None of his things were with him of course. Ms. Kassen let him store his stuff at the kitchen so he didn't have to worry about carrying them around everywhere. Jack sat on the swing and broke down. He didn't mean to. He had planned to stay silent all day. Have at least one day without tears. But when he sat on the swing his mind went back in time. Back to when he was just a young boy. When mother brought him to this very spot for the first time.
"Jack honey, we're here." His mother Alice cooed, pulling up the shade on his stroller.
"Where are we?" Jack gasped, gazing around the circular clearing. Trees filled with leaves of all colours stretched up to the sky around them. "How did they clear out a patch of the trees mommy?"
"They didn't. Angels did."
"Mommy, I'm 4, you don't have to lie to me." Jack said sternly, grabbing onto Alice's neck as she lifted him from the buggy.
"It's true dear. An angel took a cookie cutter and cut a circle out of the forest so all the special little boys and girls would have somewhere safe to play where the other angels in heaven could look after them all at once." She laughed kissing his cheek.
"Are the angels watching me now mommy?"
"The angels are always watching. They watch over you no matter what. And one day when I'm an angel, I'll be watching too."
"I don't want you to be an angel mommy. I want you to stay here with me and make me peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and brush my hair and make sure I eat my yucky vegetables so I can have my dessert." Jack whispered.
"Can't daddy do that?" She chuckled.
"What if daddy leaves for heaven with you?" A tear fell from the little boys eye.
"We're here now darling don't cry. We'll be here as long as you need us." She whispered, whipping her sons tear streaked cheeks.
"You lied to me!" Jack screamed to the sky. "I still needed you and you left me alone. You left me here to die." The tears blurred his eyes and his voice became hoarse. He fell off the swing, collapsing onto his knees and sobbing into his hands. He sat in that position all night until he fell asleep. He knew he was supposed to check in at the kitchen but he didn't have the energy. No one would worry if they didn't hear from him tonight, he thought, he wasn't worth shit. No. No one would care.
