"Wait!" Alex yelled. He couldn't let things go like this and have his mom hear about it. He sprinted after the boy, leaving his friends to wonder what just happened. Out of breath, he finally reached him in the front parking lot.
"Go away." Jack mumbled, his eyes read and swollen.
"I'm sorry, I was joking. I didn't know you'd be here. I would have never have guessed in a million fucking years that I'd turn around and see you standing there." Alex pleaded his case.
"And that makes it okay? That makes it totally fine to make fun of me, and disgrace me with your friends, just because you think I won't hear it? Alex Gaskarth you are a fucking asshole." Tears were falling from the boys eyes now, and it actually broke Alex's heart to see him like that, knowing all that he had already been through, and knowing that he had caused them this time.
"I know. But fuck Jack, it's not like we're best friends or even friends at all. We met once. You didn't need to stalk me at lunch." Alex scoffed, looking away from the boy.
"Just because we're not best friends, doesn't mean you should trash me. And I'm sorry I came looking for you, but I don't know anyone here yet and your mother told me where I could find you. I haven't been in school since my parents died, today had already been hard enough and I really didn't want to be the weird kid sitting alone. But that would have been a lot better than hearing about how I want you to butt fuck me." The tears were gone now, leaving red stains on Jacks cheeks as he struggled to control his breathing again.
"So you do like penis?" Alex joked.
"It doesn't matter whether I like girls or guys okay Alex, what matters is I really hate you." Jack fumed, walking into the brown bricked building, and slamming the door in Alex's face. Alex didn't know what to feel. He kept telling himself that he couldn't care less but for some weird reason, he felt terrible. It was Jack. Some random homeless kid. They weren't friends, they barely knew each other, but seeing the younger boy cry shook Alex to his very core. There was no way he could go back to his friends.
Alex had decided to skip the rest of the day, and just walk around the city. After about an hour of wandering, he ended up at a park surrounded by forest. There was no one there, so he just took a seat on a swing. He wanted to escape his thoughts, but instead they came flooding in, faster than before. One thought stood out more than the rest.
Was Jack actually gay?
That would explain why he was so upset. And if he was.. did he actually like Alex? No. That's stupid. They had barely even had a conversation the other night, you can't fall for someone that fast. No. This was all ridiculous. Jack wasn't angry at him because he was gay, he was angry because Alex had totally trashed him. Anyone would be upset, gay or straight. Besides, a cute, innocent guy like Jack would never want to be caught up with an asshole like Alex. Wait... cute? Did he actually just call Jack Barakat cute? What the fuck. Jack was messing with his head. Alex liked guys. wait no, no fuck shit oh lord no, Alex liked girls. He had sex with Sam 24/7 and he LIKED it. He liked her kisses and her soft hands. He liked vagina ok. Alex Gaskarth. Was. Not. Gay.
It had started to rain, so Alex was forced to abandon his thoughts and work his way back home. It only took about 20 minutes before he was welcomed inside by his mom and his dinner already set out for him.
"Oh good lord Alex, you're soaked! Why on earth would you sit outside in that down pour? Where were you?" His mother pestered.
"Just sat at the park thinking." Alex mumbled in reply.
"Did you see the Barakat kid at school today? I promised him you'd help introduce him to the school. He was reluctant but I insisted that he let you help him out. That boy's been through a lot of shit lately, I figured it was time he had a break. I'm sorry I told him about your little lunch spot but it just slipped out once Ms. Kassen told me about his enrollment at Oakly. Oh I hope you were nice to him Alex dear." Ms. Gaskarth rambled on and on all through dinner, but Alex barely replied, he just stared blankly at his plate. He could barely fake a smile when his mom attempted a joke, there was no way he could have forced himself to join into the conversation as well. No, he just let her rant on as she pleased.
That night wasn't as hard as Alex had anticipated it to be. He fell asleep quite early, around 11. But that's when the trouble started. His dreams. Alex had always had vivid dreams. They had never been a problem for him before. They were almost fun. He had a private life outside of the real world, that only his subconscious controlled. No parents, no teachers, just him. But that night was different. His subconscious betrayed him, and brought him somewhere he never wished to be. Jack Barakat's bedroom.
Alex wasn't quite sure why he had decided to go over to Jack's, but he was glad he had. The two boys sat on Jack's bed watching Across The Universe. Alex wasn't too fond of the movie, but it was one of Jack's favorites. At first it was awkward sitting so close on the bed, but after a while he got used to the warmth radiating off the younger boys skin. And Alex's heart skipped a beat when Jack slowly laid his head into the crook of his neck. It fit so perfectly, it brought tears to his eyes. Losing interest in the movie, he started tracing little circles on the back of Jack's palm. Jack closed his eyes and lost himself in the tingle of the other males touch. It warmed his skin, it stopped his breath. Alex felt the boy gasp as his fingers traced up his arm. He knew the boy felt it too. The electricity between them. He knew the boy wouldn't mind if he slid his cold hand down his back into his pants. He knew he would probably groan with pleasure if he grabbed on to his cock as he got down on his knees and encircled it with his mouth as his steamy breath touched the inside of his thighs. It was only natural to feel this way. Each of the boys craved it. Their hearts ached with longing to explore the other. They needed it.
"Alex?" Jack choked, breaking the silence.
"Yes Jack?" Alex chuckled.
"Do you hate me?" Jack whimpered.
"No. Why on earth would I hate you? I care about you so much baby, I need you." Alex felt his heart break. He could never hate the beautiful boy beside him. He cared about him so much it hurt. He grabbed onto the boys hand, and never wanted to let go, hoping the harder he held it the more Jack would believe him
"I know you hate me Alex."
"No! I could never hate you hun, you're my whole world." Alex cried desperately as Jack pulled his arm away.
"Alex, you hate me. I can't talk to you anymore. I can't be hurt like this. You're a cruel bastard doing this to me." Jack replied unemotionally, slowly getting up and standing in front of the bed, facing away from Alex.
"Jack no please no stop I need you." Alex begged. But Jack didn't listen, he just climbed onto the window sill, and sat there as Alex pleaded.
"Thanks Alex. Thanks." Jack whispered as he slid out of the open window. Alex ran to the sill, hot tears blinding him. He looked down to where Jack had fallen, but the boy wasn't there. He was no where in sight.
Alex woke startled. Sweat mixed with burning tears on his face. His palms shaking. He didn't know who he was anymore. Everything he thought he knew about himself, went out the window with that one dream. His subconcious was trying to convince him he was in love. In love with a guy. No, no. He didn't like guys. He only liked Jack. Wait.. did he? Did he actually like the homeless kid with the obnoxious hair? All he really knew was he just had a dream where he wanted to suck a dick. All because of Jack. Fucking. Barakat
