Shining Stars and Precious Jewels

Chapter Two - Precious

-Khun POV-

It feels great to be out of that icebox. I'm happy Bam's okay, but I'm worried. The data of Jahad was so powerful not even the data of three Khun family high-rankers could defeat him. I suppose when Bam becomes a ranker, he might even be stronger than Mascheny Jahad, although she does have the Yellow May.

I need to stay with him as long as I can. I know how fast he's growing, how we'll never be able to keep up. But I have to.

Bam showed me how to have feelings again. I fear that if I lose him, I will lose my feelings and be a cold, unfeeling person again. I fear this, though I would never admit it.

It's cold out tonight. For some reason all I can think of is something I said to Wangnan once, that when I find a precious jewel, I hide it to keep it safe, even if I can never wear it. But isn't something only precious when you can lose it? Is it better to hide something away or appreciate its beauty before I lose it? Isn't the possibility of losing something what makes that something special, or is the possibility of losing it too much, so you can never grow attached? If you could lose a friend, would you distance yourself for a death that might never come, or become close to enjoy as much time you have together?

From the moment I first saw Bam, I was immediately attached.

What was wrong with me?

My lifelong policy of never getting attached to anything and anyone just flew out the window when I saw this innocent boy. Why? What was it about him? His innocence, his kindness, his bravery? And why couldn't I stop thinking about him? I even chose to sabotage my own test so he could go up, even though I got to go up anyway, but why? Since when have I sacrificed something for myself for someone else, done something that I didn't gain anything from? What is it, about this precious jewel that I just couldn't bear to hide away?