i dont know whats up. i failed at posting on tumblr. i told riley about my self destructive tendencies. i dont know how i feel about that though. he knows a lot. too much maybe. i cant sleep, im more blank than anything now tho. i hate being blank. it makes even the simplest tasks hard. like feeling, thats difficult. sleeping is just not good for me anymore. im empty and when i do feel, its mostly sad. just down and upset. i apologize for everything even if its not my fault, i somehow make bad things my fault.
goodnight.
