JossBas: Is It Really Meant to Be?

Chapter 19

A/N: The above image does not belong to me. It belongs to the person who uploaded it on the internet.

Bas' POV

"I want to go home, P'Joss, I want to go home, please," I pleaded to P'Joss after he gave me a set of clothes to wear to replace my wet clothes.

"Of course I'll take you home," Joss said, his face looking grim, "you don't have to plead with me Bas. You have shown me without any further doubt who it is you truly love."

"I'm so sorry, P'Joss!" I started to cry all over again, "I didn't mean to hurt you! I thought we were just going to have dinner and have fun watching the sunset after."

"It's okay, Bas, you really don't have to explain anything," Joss was almost in tears himself, "it was my fault for expecting too much from you."

The drive back home was in total silence. The amount of time coming to the beach seemed double or triple the time going back because of the tense silence that descended upon me and P'Joss.

When we finally reached the gate of my house, P'Joss parked the car.

We couldn't look at each other.

Suddenly, P'Joss buried his face into his arms that were resting on the wheel of his car. I could tell he was crying silently.

I loved him but not the way that I loved P'Gxxod, but because I loved P'Joss even in in a lesser way, my heart was breaking at seeing him crying silently.

I unbuckled my seat belt and moved close to him and put my arms around him.

Wrong move. He started sobbing loudly into his arms that were still resting on the wheel.

Then slowly, he raised his head and turned his tear stricken face to me.

"I think it's best that I don't see you anymore, Bas," he said, almost in a whisper.

It was my turn to start crying.

"P'Joss, I don't want to stop seeing you! I'm going to miss you!" I cried.

"No, Bas, it hurts too much knowing that I'm not the one you love. I don't want to be just friends with you, Bas, I want to be your lover, and it's not gonna happen for as long as Gxxod is in your life," P'Joss was talking between sobs.

"But if I ask to see you, will you see me, P'Joss?" I tried to bargain one last time.

I could see the indecision on his face.

"I don't know, Bas, I really don't know," he said tearfully, "right now I just want to go home."

"Okay, P'Joss," I relented, "but I'm still hoping that we could be good friends."

"Good bye, Bas," he said, looking away from me.

On impulse, I grabbed his neck and kissed him on his cheek.

"Good bye, Bas," he said once more, still not looking at me but my lips felt wet from the tears that rolled down his cheek.

I quietly stepped out of his car and closed the door.

I tried to wave good bye but he drove away without looking back at me even once.

I sighed as I let myself in using the duplicate key I had for the gate of our house.

As I stepped inside the gate, I took my phone from my pocket to text P'Joss a good night.

Oh shit, I saw on my screen a missed video call from P'Gxxod and a text also from him saying that he was getting discharged from the hospital tomorrow. He must have called and texted while I was in the water watching the sunset with P'Joss.

I immediately tapped on P'Gxxod's number and waited for him to take my call.

My call went to voice mail.

I decided to text him.

"I'm sorry that I missed your video call, P'Gxxod. I tried calling you just now but you're not picking up."

I waited for a reply but none came.

I tried again.

"P'Gxxod, I'm happy to know that you're being discharged tomorrow. Can I visit you at the hospital tomorrow before you get discharged?"

Again I waited for a reply. Again, none came.

I sighed deeply as I let myself into the house with a spare key.