Queen Of Hell & Paradise (Immortal gods: Book 1)

Chapter 33- Absence

Samantha

Monday morning Hades wasn't waiting for me by my car.

Or Tuesday morning either.

The spot in front of the driver's door was empty- devoid of his tall leaning frame. An ugly feeling sank into the bottom of my stomach, I guess our argument was bigger than I thought. I knew I should have said or done something that would've made him stay on Sunday. I just couldn't help snapping at him when he told me my dad was awkward and defensive only because I was...

As always, I was looking forward to seeing him leaning against the driver's door, looking handsome in his all black outfit. I loved when the light breeze would lift the edges of his dark curls just a little bit when he'd straighten up to greet me. The image of his lean figure stays engraved in my mind as I slide into the driver's seat.

I make a pointed effort not to give the passenger's side a glance, that's usually where he sits. I've grown used to driving to school with him in comfortable silence. On days he was feeling particularly brave, he'd even reach out and entwine his fingers with mine, occasionally brushing my shoulder.

As far as guys go, Hades is pretty hesitant to make any kind of move. Maybe that's why I was pretty surprised when he tried flirting with me this weekend. He sucks at it , I think to myself with a small laugh. It was still cute that he tried though.

Out of all the guys I've dated, he has to be the most cautious and self-effacing one. Every time he nears me, every time he approaches me, there's a look of wariness in his eyes. Whenever he reaches out to touch me in the Underworld- like when we float- he gets this look of surprise when I don't pull away.

What's he afraid of? Does he think I'm going to snap at him if he gets too close to me?

I tap my fingers on the steering wheel, looking away for a second. He probably does. With the way I spoke to him Sunday, I'm pretty sure that's what he thinks. I let out a small sigh, thinking about our last conversation.

I don't want him thinking he can't get near me or I'll snap. What the hell is wrong with me? What kind of message have I been giving the world? Luke, the cheerleaders, my dad, Hades... What do they think of me? Do they think they can't approach me without getting their head bitten off?

Maybe Hades was right- as much as I hate to admit it- about me being defensive all the time. I can't keep pushing people away just to protect myself. How many people haven't I already hurt by becoming absorbed in my own protective, little bubble?

Enough, I said to myself. I've hurt enough people as it is.

I switch lanes at the stoplight, stealing a glance at oncoming traffic. I'm not sure I'm ready for a practice routine with the girls right now. How can I even face them after Bethany was hospitalized? It says a lot about my ability to lead them as captain.

Maybe I'm not as good a leader as I thought I was...

Feeling guilty, I drive alone in deafening silence as I make my way to school. I'd made a trip to the house to grab some supplies I'd forgotten for today's routine. The whole time was spent with me thinking about the events of this past weekend. I haven't heard from Bethany, and I haven't seen Hades at school.

Are they both avoiding me?

Probably.

Shaking my head, I pull up to the school- adjusting my car into the small parking space. Sooner or later, I have to face the girls. It's best if I just get it over with. We have a game coming up in two weeks, so I can't put off talking to them for another few days. They need me, I whisper to myself.