The Bet ✔

|37| No!

| Emma |

I was soaking in the hot water of the bath for about an hour before I finally decided to get out and when I did I was feeling less dirty and a bit less tense but my chest still felt like there was someone standing on top of it and my head still hurt from thinking about Tyler and what he did to me. I may have looked better physically but mentally I was a mess.

Walking out of the bathroom in a towel, I searched my drawers for the perfect set of pajamas, my plan was to stay home all weekended cuddled up with my books and my coffee.

Somehow I took comfort in the many romance novels that lined my shelves, I knew there was a possibility they would make me feel worse about what Tyler did to me but I couldn't help it. I wanted to escape reality; I wanted to believe that there was true love and sweet boys out there that would do anything to give their girls their well deserved happy ending; and most of all I wanted to erase everything I knew about Tyler and take comfort in making believe I was the girl in one of those books I was reading.

I wanted to be the girl that the boy wanted and did everything for.

I slide both legs inside my loose gray pajama leggings and right after pulled a soft hoodie over my head, I knew it was the beginning of June and summer was rapidly approaching but that wasn't going to stop me from wearing my too big for me hoodie and snuggling up with a book — I could care less right now.

I passed the long length mirror that stood near my computer desk to reach my bookshelf, when I stopped and took two steps back, gazing at my reflection in the mirror again.

Am I that hideous that they picked on me for fun? Thoughts began rolling through my conscience and not good ones. Maybe its because I'm not a skinny mini or have a model figure? I slowly lifted my hoodie and ran my fingers lightly over my soft belly. Before I knew it tears were cascading down my cheeks. Who the hell am I kidding? I know that's the reason. That and my thick thighs, my big hips, my dimples, dips and curves...ugh! I scolded myself in my head as I ran my fingernails harder against the skin of my belly.

God why the hell can't I be like every other girl? Why can't I be like Lena? The perfect fit for a boy! I internally screamed at myself again as angry tears continuously rolled down my cheeks. I pressed my fingernails even harder against my skin and before I knew it I was no longer pressing, I was scraping and scratching. I stood there and watched myself claw at my belly skin as a sob wracked through my body. I became furious and used both hands digging and clawing with my nails until my skin was bright red and eventually there was some traces of blood.

I had officially felt the most hate I ever did.

A knock snapped me from my mental break down. My head snapped towards the door and I roughly wiped away my tears, clearing my throat.

"O-One second..." thinking it was my mom or my brothers I knew I had to hide the fact that I had been crying and in a bad mental state. I sniffled a few times and took a couple deep breaths to calm myself. Looking down at my scratched up belly I quickly went to the bathroom to splash some water on it and wipe away any little bits of blood from the scrapes. I hissed at the burning sensation some of them caused but quickly pulled my hoodie back down and walked out of my bathroom towards the door.

When I opened the door the first thing I wanted to do was slam it shut and scream — the last person I wanted to be standing there was there.

How the hell did he even get into the house? Did my brothers seriously let him in?

I didn't give him a chance to say a thing because I was quick to slam the door closed, ready to tell him to get the hell out and go back home but one thing stopped me.