BREATHE [✔]

12.Last First kiss

Chester

Conrad had woken up in a lighter mood but not as hyper as he usually is but I didn't care he was laughing and smiling. And not trying to find answers at the bottom of a whiskey glass. We fell on to the ground still laughing smiling. Running my hands through his curls all my worries seemed to disappear.

I sang along to the soft tunes of you make me feel like a natural woman.

"So I make you feel like a natural woman?" I asked laughing.

"yes, certainly a rosa parks if u will. "

"Oh, Rosa, that's powerful. "

As the song continued on repeat all I could think of was this was the type of music they played on Romcom tv shows. Especially when they played a video montage of the couple and all their so in love moments.

Feeling him feel for my face like a blind man. I looked down and saw Conrad looking at me with a sad smile. It wasn't one of those 'this-is-a-pitiable-situations' types of look. It was more of, the type of look you give a child who believes so little of themselves.

"You think too much." He said using the base of his palm to wipe tears I didn't realize were falling.

I smiled in response.

I sniffled but kept my hand in his hair. His curls gave me comfort regardless of the tears.

"You know I ... " He glanced up "I am here for you. "

I tried yet another simple smile.

I felt like that wasn't what he was going to say but I was okay with it. We sat in the same position, his heard on my lap my hand running through his curls. Hearts pumping like crazy. A comfortable silence enveloping us in its warmth. It couldn't be more peaceful.

"You know normally I dance to this song in a large puffy white dress  . . . but I didn't want to scare you." I joke. He didn't respond clearly lost in his train of thought.

Conrad

Lying on the floor in the peaceful silence that was Chester and I's relationship I couldn't help but remember a similar memory between us.

Chester sat on the floor legs crossed and everything. I Placed my head in his laps while laying on the floor in an awkwardly comfortable position so I could look at him. It was always peaceful with him. He seemed to calm the wreck in my heart. Just his presence made me feel whole. And I couldn't help but hope I made him fill whole too. He trailed his fingers through my curls with one hand while he used the one to scroll through something on his phone.

"Stop looking at me with that look," He said with a smile spreading across his lips.

"What look."

"Like I am saving you because I am not. "

"I can't stop looking at you. " I answered sitting up. 

I sat up. Chester and I were at eye level now. Everything in the room seemed to be silent except for that damned alien wall clock he loved so much. He didn't say a word. I didn't say a word. But we both seemed to be moving in. I don't know what I expected but it was not what happened next.

Chester placed his palm on my cheek and slowly slid it towards the back of my head. He pulled me in, in a gentle but firm grasp as if he had been doing this with me all week. Placing his lips on mine he slowly moved his lips in sync with mine. I was taken back but not surprised if that makes sense. His kisses were soft firm and they seemed to say a lot yet nothing at the same time. Feelings and emotions were drowning me but I didn't want to come up for air I wanted to stay I needed to stay this was giving me feelings I had yet to experience as if a part of me locked away had finally been open. A part I didn't want to let go of anytime soon.

So as my domineering part took a hold of me my possessive part also took over and before I knew it I was on the flow pinning Chester down and kissing him like I hoped he hadn't kissed anyone before. Marking him as my own and probably ruining his relationship in the process. I traced my hand on his abs and he shivered. Placing kisses all over the place my hands and been I heard his breath hitch and as I concentrated on a place just under his collarbone he let out a low growl. I could feel the need or urge if you will go further but because I thought Chester wasn't ready for it. I stopped everything abruptly. And before I stood up I gave him a small reassuring smile then walked over to the PSP controllers and lifted one of them.

"FIFA or GTA? "  I asked studying him for just a moment. As if nothing had happened.

He didn't say anything but he smiled. A happy smile,  not one of his 'hope this fools you smile '. I let my eyes ride up his body noticing the way his chest moved rapidly up and down because he was out of breath and the two buttons that lay askew on the carpet. His hair was also part of the narrative if you ask me. For a second it was blissfully happy till we heard the knock on the door.

Written [11.06.19]

Edited [07.03.20]