Letters to my Ex

Letter 7

Dear ex,

I can't believe I went to that stupid party. And I'm even more stupid for believing that you wouldn't be there. Of course you were there. You're blue eyes captured mine as soon as I walked through the door. I gave you a small wave and a smile because we left on good terms. We're friends somehow right?

I ended up bumping into Stacey and she handed me a red solo cup. It was filled with golden brown liquid. I told myself I wasn't going to get trashed tonight. And then I heard your laugh...

And because of your laugh, I smiled to Stacey, brought the cup to my lips and drowned myself in the cheap beer. I happily took the next drink I was given which was rum and cola.

Your favourite.

I took a small sip of the alcohol and my lips trembled. Who would've thought that the taste of a common beverage would have me on the verge of tears. I ended up tipping out the drink and filled the cup up with soda instead.

Tonight I was gonna be sober.

I sat at the little fold out table that the host considered as a 'grand dining table for four' most of the night. A couple of people stared at me weirdly and my soda ended up going flat. Of course I was getting looks, I was sitting in this chair with a sparkly gold cami top and white jeans. I had my scarf and black coat draped around the chair due to the body heat bouncing around in this cheap looking frat house. I didn't want to be in the city during New Year's Eve, it would've been hard to move around so coming out of town for it was my best option, plus Stacey's sorority was just down the road and she had an extra bed I could crash in.

When she asked me to come, I instantly thought about you. I asked if you were going but she reassured me and told me that you were visiting home for a few more days since you'd be graduating very soon. So this leads me to where I am now.

Lying on the couch in my shared apartment with dozens of tissues around me because of that one particular night...

I remember it all because I wasn't drinking. But you were. Once again, you were drunk and was I surprised? No, not really. Every now and then you would walk past me and steal a quick glance before scurrying off into the small kitchen to do a round of shots.

Then I moved to the living room. Everyone stood around the sixty inch tv that was hanging up on the wall while we watched the countdown begin.

10...

You were nowhere to be found.

9...

My fingers fiddled anxiously in front of me.

8...

Someone bumped into me.

7...

The anticipation in the room maximised.

6...

You and your friends finally walked in.

5...

Your eyes met mine.

4...

My heart skipped a beat.

3...

Everyone started to scream and shout.

2...

You started to approach me.

1...

You kissed her lips.