Letters to my Ex

Letter 3

Dear ex,

I stopped by at our favourite restaurant tonight. It's a warm Friday night and as I was on my way home from work, I walked past the restaurant and looked at it. In our spot by the large window that was huddled away in the corner, away from the world, was a couple.

They looked so happy that everyone else around them seemed irrelevant. They looked like they had came straight out of some romantic movie on Netflix. He would be talking to her and she would suddenly throw her head back and let out a giggle. The look in his eyes and the large grin on his face showed just how much he loved her as he admired the woman sitting across from him.

I let out a small pityful smile while I pictured us there, in our spot at this tiny restaurant in the heart of New York City. I know I sound like a creep, but this couple looked like it was too good to be true.

Just as I was about to walk away, the local band that's always been playing there since our first date, started singing Perfect by Ed Sheran. The song brought a smile to my face and I didn't know how to feel. The people outside the restaurant had seem to quieten down so they could enjoy the live music that echoed out of the small place and into the busy streets of New York City.

And then the guy stood up. And just as I thought he was gonna leave her, he dropped down onto one knee and his hands shuffled in his back pocket, fishing out a red velvet box.

It was obvious what was happening. By now, everyone sitting outside of the restaurant was silent, basking in on the love and happiness this couple were having.

Tears pricked her eyes and I'll admit, mine were watery too. She nodded her head vigorously and she bent down, placing a passionate kiss on his lips.

It felt rude to watch someone else being happy as she held out her left hand and he slipped on the ring. Once everyone cheered and congratulated the couple, my happiness simmered to a stop and I was suddenly drowned in thoughts of us and thunderclouds.

I was jealous of the woman because I've sat in the same chair hoping that one day, when we are on our date night at the restaurant just down the road from our apartment, that you'll find the courage and love to bend down and ask me to marry you.

But it never happened.

I don't know. Was it going to happen or was it just some stupid fairytale dream of mine? Was I wanting too much from you? Or was I giving you too much that you felt the need to escape?

I'll tell you what I wanted though. I wanted us to settle down and be happy. I didn't want us to have to go to college parties at your mates houses because you needed to go. Remember that one time that I begged you to stay home one night because I wasn't feeling up to going? But you forced me to come with you anyway?

Yeah, we'll that day, I had found out that a girl from my old high school had died while giving birth to her first child. I wasn't friends with this girl but she had been in a few of my classes back at home. But you know what makes it even more sadder? Her parents decided to abandon her because she was suppose to save herself for marriage and on top of that, the father wanted nothing to do with the child.

And even though I was tired and depressed because of that heartbreaking news, I tried to make you happy and went to that stupid party anyway.

I wanted us to finally drop this teenage love and become actual adults who didn't sneak around and go to parties and we would travel to different places during our free time. We would adopt a cat because I'm allergic of dogs and we'd agree on a name we both liked.

But once you left me after I tried my best to make you happy, I'm sort of glad that it wasn't me and you sitting in that spot on a Friday night in New York City.