Fuck I don't belong here I hate my life I hate this stupid shit that I'm going through. I felt the tears swell up in my eyes the lump in my throat grew bigger. Why would Ryan say things like that why would he tell Brittany. He played me and I actually thought he liked me. I sat in my room sobbing, I got up to go wash my face I bet I looked like a mess. I quickly washed my face and got dressed into sweats and an old Red Hot Chili Peppers tank top.
" Amber are you in here?" Matt called.
" yeah it's me I was just washing my face"
" oh I thought the party was still going I mean it's only 10:30." he said as he took a seat on my bed.
" I wasnt feeling well and I was pretty tired so I asked one of the guys then to drop me off..." I said as I stood in the doorway of my bathroom.
" what about Ryan?" He asked raising an eyebrow. My heart raced when I heard his name.
" He was pretty drunk and I couldn't ask him for a ride back." I made sure I sounded like I wasn't lying.
" Yeah ok that was smart..." Matt's voice sounded like he knew what was really going on but I didn't bother to explain further.
" I am gonna go to sleep, I actually wanted to go summer job hunting just so I have money when I got back to New Jersey " I told him. He got up and stood at my door.
" who said you were going back? " he said with that look on his face.
" Who said I was going to stay? " I jumped into bed. He closed the door behind him and that was it.
* Next morning *
I got up around 8am to the smell of burnt bread. I got out of bed thinking maybe Val or Matt left the toaster on.
" Hello-guys the toaster is left on!" I yelled as I rushed downstairs.
" Goodmorning sleepy head " Derek smiled.
" umm hey-what are you doing?" I chuckled at the sight of burnt bread on a plate and what looked like Nutella spread on top.
" well jimmy let me in and I decided to make you breakfast but-yeah." He laughed at his fail attempt.
" How about we go to a diner? " I asked as I walked up to my room not asking if he agreed. I got dressed into black jeans and a white nirvana crop top I grabbed my red and black flannel and white chucks. I quickly put my hair up in a bun and brushed my teeth and applied make up.
" Took you a while." Derek jokingly said as I walked downstairs.
" Well perfection takes a while you can't just rush it" I winked as I walked right past him. " Are you coming or are you just gonna sit there." I looked back and saw him sitting there with a smile on his face.
" you're so lucky you're attractive." He laughed as he held the car door open.
" Do all the rich white kids here have rich parents who buy them nice cars?" I asked as I got into his white Audi. We pulled onto PCH before he answered my question.
" Not everyone has rich parents..or even parents at all...my parents died when I was only a few months old..I went into the whole being an orphan kid..I bounced around between foster homes and group homes finally I got put with this one woman who lived by herself in a pretty old apartment and I mean she wasnt rich but she did everything to get me things I wanted I decided to give back I started working at some local surf shop and one day a photographer saw me surfing and he said If I was interested in becoming a surf wear model I made good money and bought my new mom a better place to live."
I let that sink in so I wasn't the only one who didn't have parents but yet he was pretty lucky to have a person to raise him.
" wow-umm I'm sorry that happened" I said and I did mean it Im just never good at expressing my feelings.
" The thing is I don't want you to feel sorry for me Amber I want you to see that being an 'orphan' isn't a curse I know what happened with your mom is horrible but make the best of it because life goes on even when we want to quit maybe this will lead you to something great make the people you care about proud and just say fuck you to the people who try to bring you down."
Derek was right my mom was dead and as harsh as this might sound I wasn't I shouldn't stop living my life. I sat there quiet and before I knew it we pulled into Ihop.
" International House of Pancakes , here we go." Derek finally spoke up. I got out of the car and walked by his side inside where we sat down in a booth by the back part of the restaurant.
" Thank you Derek." I said with a smile. He just smiled back and before he could say something I looked back because I heard a familiar voice..an annoying voice.
Brittany and Ryan were here..just my fucking luck. After last night I just wanted to claw both their eyes out. This was gonna be interesting..
