How I See It

Chapter 6 - Pain In Loss

I open my eyes and run to Noah's room and I almost wake him up, but then I completely forgot that there is no one to wake up. He's gone. I try to keep the tears in but after I see a photo of us hanging, I couldn't control it.

Next thing I know, I'm sitting in front of his room on the floor with my head in my hands. "Breakfast!" I'm surprised that my mother even woke up. I walk down the stairs like a dead lake who just got alive again. "Hey, mom" I whisper with a soft, weak voice. "Hey, gurly. It's the first day of Summer. I hope you packed already." I stare at her. "Packed? For what?" She laughs. "For Summer Camp, silly."

My heart starts racing. She never told me about his. And why does she look fine? Why isn't she crying like me? "How could you? What is wrong with you!" I stare at her and I run back upstairs. I hear a loud sigh along the way to my room. I move closer to the stairs and listen. "Hey babes." Babes? Who's that? "Yeah, she's doing a bit better. She still looks terrible. Have you found anything yet?" She's talking about me, but to whom? I stand up to get closer but then one of the planks creaks.

Shit. "Gabby girl, get down right now! I'll call you back. Yeah, love you too." She puts the phone down and watches me with her hands on the table. "Who's babes? Why were you talking about me?" She stares at me. "Fine." She takes a deep breath. "I met someone a few years ago. Well not met, but saw again. We were in high school together. He asked me if I wanted to get some coffee and I said yes. After that we just hit it off. We love each other. He's divorced too."

I nod at her. "Mom, I'm very happy for you, but why didn't you tell us... I mean... Me?" She moves to the fridge and open it. "Don't worry. That doesn't have to change. You see, Rick is a private investigator and he told me that the chances of Noah being alive are 70%. He said that they found a body a few meters away from the van. And next to that body, two other bodies laid on the ground. Maybe Noah is one of those bodies. We think he and another inmate got out the van before the explosion. How they did it, we still don't know."

I don't know what to feel. Angry because she didn't tell me or happy because my brother might still be alive. "Mom, why didn't you tell me this before? I could have helped." She walks towards me and kisses my forehead. "I'm sorry baby. I know I should've told you. But at least there might be a chance of your brother being alive."

I hug her tightly and tell her that I love her. We stayed like that till we heard the doorbell. I walked to the door and hoped for the best. I opened it and saw that Ava, Rose and Kylie was standing next to each other with mascara melting from their eyes.

I invite them in and let them take a seat on the black leathered couch. "I am so sorry about Noah, Gabby. He was like a brother to me," Rose said with tears.

"He was supposed to become famous one day," Ava said while wipping the tears off her face.
"Thanks you guys. I'm sure you all meant a lot to him. You were there for him when no one wanted to be friends with him." I shouldn't have said that because everyone bursted out into tears.

I was feeling guilty. I had to tell them. "Guys... There's something I need to tell you. We don't think Noah is... dead." Silence took over. "My mom's boyfriend is an investigator. He said that three people got out of the van. One died and the other two, just... disappeared. I need you guys to not tell anyone about this. Please. We're not sure about it, but we want to find out more."

Kylie stands up and looks at me from a higher level. "We will do what ever it takes to get him back. If you need us, don't hesitate to ask, please." I stand up and give her a hug. Ava and Rose also stand up and join the hug.

After we said goodbye to each other, the girls left and I grabbed my coat. I told my mom that I was going to Smith. I got in the car and drove away from my house and I passed Smith's house. I kept on driving and I knew exactly where I was headed. The crime scene.

I turned up some music and shouted the lyrics with my windows open. I didn't care about anyone else right now. All I wanted to do was find my brother. That was my mission.

I got to the cliff and parked the car a few meters away from the 'Do Not Cross' tape. I did the opposite and crossed the tape and walked down the cliff. It wasn't that high and there were some rocks that somehow formed a path to walk down.

As soon as I got down, I searched for evidence markers. I saw three of them next to each other a few meters away from the van that was now gone. I walked towards it and checked it out. I looked closely and imagined Noah's body. From the size of his body and the laid in ground, it looks the same. I got up and stared at the woods. "Crap."

I looked back up the cliff and stared. I took a deep breath and walked into the woods. It was dark and cold. All sounds I could hear was the sound of insects and frogs.
I kept in walking and walking. I looked at my phone and saw that I only had one bar of signal. It was starting to get dark, so I had to text my mother. 'Staying at Smith's 2night. Love u.'

I walked and walked and finally got to a cave that seemed like it could help me through the night. I went inside and turned my torch on. I saw two heads of cockroaches that were ripped from their bodies. That didn't make sense. Unless... Unless Noah was here. He had to eat the cockroaches. I was feeling so much better already.

I took off my coat and puffed it to make a cushion. My mind couldn't switch off. I was thinking about Noah and my life even. All the people in my class were jealous of me. Not that I'm being a bitch, but it's the truth. Even the teachers were unfair and cruel. I closed my eyes and let out a tear. Seconds after I fell asleep.

"Gaaabbbyyyy." I stood still and didn't move. "Gaabbbyyy. You have to wake up! " Morning came and I heard the birds chirping. I got up and turned around to go out. What I saw was unbelievable. It... It couldn't have been real, right? His green and blue eyes were staring at me. I opened my mouth and tears came out of my eyes. "Noah!"