My Muse

6

Jinyoung tossed and turned in his bed. But not too much. He'd wake Mark.

They spent only half an hour taking pictures, Jinyoung capturing Mark in different poses and angles, every picture perfect only because of the subject in them. Then Mark grew even more tired than he already was, so Jinyoung convinced him to stay up long enough to eat and shower before going off to bed. Jinyoung used that time to look over the fresh batch of images he loaded onto his computer, admiring every curve and angle of Mark's precious body that was there to offer.

Now it was much later into the night. Mark was asleep right next to him in his bed, again just inches away from Jinyoung who had absolutely no permission to touch him despite wanting to so bad. That's mostly what ended up making his nights sleepless. He spent the majority of them staring at Mark's back longing for any physical contact that he never ended up getting besides maybe one of Mark's stray feet kicking him in the thigh as he flipped around in bed.

He at least cherished just that though, being able to watch Mark's slow calm breathing as he peacefully slept away the long stressful hours of his day. It was hard to keep his desires at bay while laying so close to what he wanted so bad, but Jinyoung was used to this struggle, he was used to the pain of it all.

He always wondered though, if the universe really just wanted to make him suffer. It was sort of rediculous to think, but he was starting to believe so when Mark let out a soft groan, his body flipping over towards Jinyoung. Now they were face to face, Mark's soft even breaths ghosting along Jinyoung's lips, and if his heart could beat any faster Jinyoung would've had a heart attack.

His eyes raked over Mark's heavenly features; soft skin gleaming in the moonlight, lashes long and curved, lips pink and delectably plump. Jinyoung cursed himself for falling so damn hard for this man, he really hated it. But he loved Mark more than he hated his own feelings, so it all canceled out.

So many scenarios raced through his head. He wanted to hug Mark close, dive his hands into those auburn locks of hair, tangle their fingers together and feel his body heat. Jinyoung was a complete sucker for anything Mark, and his craving only grew more irresistible the longer he laid there staring.

Jinyoung found himself inching closer, just mere centimeters remaining between their faces. He shouldn't be doing this. Mark was asleep, and getting closer to him without his approval would be a big violation of his personal space.

Jinyoung moved closer.

He was just curious, that's all. Curious of how being this close to Mark would feel like. How Mark's soft cheeks would feel being caressed under his fingertips. How perfectly their bodies would mold together. How amazing their lips would feel pressed together.

Curious was all Jinyoung was.

And shocked he was when he gently brushed his lips over Mark's, the elder's response being a soft sigh along with his eyes lazily opening, hazy gaze staring into his own. He was frozen, not exactly knowing what to do now that him and Mark were staring at each other. He nearly forgot to breathe, that was until Mark's lids drifted closed again, the elder slipping back into sleep as if nothing happened.

Jinyoung still held in that breath, laying for nearly ten minutes just staring at Mark to make sure he was for sure asleep again. He slowly turned himself over to face the opposite direction, his heated face and rosy red cheeks burning in excitement and terror and glee.

First of all, Jinyoung needed a moment to absorb the fact that he actually just kissed Mark. It was like a far off dream that he'd been longing to achieve, and now he's finally done it. His lips still tingled with the presence of Mark's on them. Along with the giddiness of finally kissing Mark came the absolute horror of what he'd done. That was very wrong, he knew. He shouldn't have done it at all. Mark could wake up and be disgusted with him and hate him for it, Jinyoung was aware of all of that, and that only made him dread how the rest of the night was going to go.

One thing was for sure though, Jinyoung lost all the self control he's been able to hold under his belt for this long. He didn't even know what came over him, he just— did it. And as much as he wanted to giggle like an idiot over his actions, he knew that what just happened could possibly ruin the friendship that he hated so much, yet wanted to keep unharmed.