The cheating - A.I

1. Colin Winters

Dear Ashton

Since you're reading this I'm guessing you found some courage to open the letter and therefore allowing me to tell you my story, my side of the story. I will never tell you that what I did was ok because it's not and will never be. Cheating is a fucked up thing.

A.fucked.up.thing

This is the story about the first time I cheated on you. It was probably one of the worst ones as well, at least for me. I didn't eat for about three days afterwards. Remember the week when I was sick and didn't want to see you for what felt like forever but in reality was about a week? 

I wasn't really sick, well at least not physically. I was sick with guilt but nothing else.

Anyway. Let's talk about Colin Winters.

It was a gray and cold evening. We had our first fight, I don't even remember about what but I do remember that I was so angry, absolutely fucking pissed. I left your flat without a jacket, running while cussing you out with every step, tears flooding and heart pounding. 

I ended up at a pub three blocks from your flat. It was a dark, smoke filled place with an old man playing a bad strummed acoustic guitar. I stood in the door way for a while to let my eyes get used to the dark before I went up to the bar and downed four, or maybe five I'm not sure, shots of Tequila. After the fourth (or fifth, who the fuck knows) my head started spinning and I leaned my head against the bar desk. I literally pressed my right cheek on the bar desk feeling the cold wood against my skin. The room kept spinning for a while and a short moment later a guy mimicked my position, resting his cheek on the bar desk, facing me. His blue eyes looked straight at me and I felt like someone had hit me in the chest. They were so intense and I've never seen anything like it before.

We stod like that in silence for a while, just staring at each other. 

He was the first one to say something.

"Hi" he whispered and gave me a crocked smile, like he wanted to tell me he knew why I was there.

"Hi"

I must have looked like absolute shit, mascara streaks on my cheeks and red eyes. Messy hair and no jacket, just a pair of jeans and a tank top. 

"Care to tell me why you're face down on a bar desk that probably has every sort of liquid stain and other nasty shit on it?" One more crocked smile.

I shrugged and slowly lifted my head from the bar. He did the same and we stod up straight and first then I noticed that he was extremely tall, pretty much like-your-friend-Luke-tall. So I had to turn my head a bit to look at him. 

"Thanks, I was afraid I was gonna get neck problems from standing like that" he joked.

I wasn't really sure on why he was still talking to me since I barely responded to his attempt to start a conversation with me. 

"Hey, wanna sit down?" He pointed at a table in the corner and I shrugged again before I followed him to the table. He was fit, broad shoulders under a plain white Oxford shirt. Black skinny jeans and boots. A weird yet perfect combination. His blonde hair was short and groomed to perfection. 

We sat down and he tilted his head looking at me.

"I'm Colin Winters" he held a hand out for me to take it and I did. 

I shook his hand and introduced myself. 

"Whatever he did, you don't deserve it" he whispered while giving me one more of his crocked smiles and I nearly choked on my own spit.