The Artist / Billie Eilish

Chapter 40

"Billie, is that Gucci? You flexing on all of us?"

"Billie, where's Rose? Where's Rose? Are you guys dating? Is it just you two here on vacation?"

"Are you gay, Billie? Billie look here!"

Shoving as many cameras out of my face as I could, I waded through the crowd of paparazzis and took deep breaths to ignore their irritating remarks, hiding even further beneath my hood.

All I wanted was to run to the store to get some breakfast for Rose.

I don't even understand how they found us here. I didn't get papped back at home... I guess now that everyone's kinda noticing me more that's something I'll have to get used to.

I gave the camera in front of my face one last shove before the huge glass doors were opened for me in perfect timing, leaving all of the loud, rude strangers behind.

"Is that going to be an issue, Miss Eilish?" The doorman asked, following me as I wandered over towards the elevators, pulling my hood down and running my hand through my hair quickly. Rose and I had gotten to know him, despite us only being here for a day so far. Rose was the chatty, friendly, happy-go-lucky type to make friends with everyone, and I'm more, uh... not that.

So I tried my best to be social without her here.

I turned and smiled at the man, Rico, leaving backwards onto the elevator button as I spoke. "Nah, don't worry about it, man. Thank you, though."

He grinned back at me, and we stood in what I thought was awkward silence until the elevator dinged, a sigh of relief excusing me from the situation.

The little paper bag crinkled between my fingers as I fiddled with it, humming softly to myself as I rode out the elevator to the right floor. Our room was so high up in this huge ass hotel that I'm pretty sure you can see the US from up here.

Okay not really, I was just tryna paint the picture.

I held the bag in my teeth as I fumbled around my pockets for the room key, struggling with it a little before the light finally turned green, wasting no time in rushing through the door.

Throwing my phone and keys on the counter, I sighed and pulled my hoodie off over my head, tossing it on the couch as I wandered towards the bedroom. It was only 8am so Rose was still sleeping, sprawled out on her stomach on top of the sheets in nothing but one of my huge shirts.

I couldn't stop a smile from tugging at my lips as a slight blush dusted my cheeks, like it always does with her. Resting the bag of food on the other side of the bed, I gently straddled the small of her back and bent down to bury my face against her neck.

She sighed softly and I could tell she wasn't fully awake yet, because she wasn't complaining. Once I nipped her ear softly with my teeth and gave her a few kisses on the cheek, I heard her start to groan, and I laughed quietly.

"Get off me," she mumbled into the pillow, unsuccessfully trying to bat me away with her arms, getting too tired and flopping them back down again.

I gave her one last kiss on her scruffy bed hair before clambering off the half-asleep girl, adjusting my chains and glancing out of the huge balcony window.

"I brought you breakfast ma, get up," I smiled at the noise of her opening the paper bag and carried on watching the endless view of palm trees. My smile faltered, only slightly, and I sighed under my breath. Turning halfway back to Rose, I glanced at her watching me with a concerned expression on her face.

"I just," I sighed again, sitting on the end of the bed as I felt her shuffle closer to me, resting her chin on my shoulder. "Surely this isn't legal, right? Or maybe it is. I'm not sure. It just doesn't feel right."

Rose furrowed her eyebrows, shaking her head slightly, mouth full of food. I grinned at her, wiping a crumb off of the side of her mouth and waited for her to speak.

"What's not legal? I don't get what you're talking about, baby."

I groaned, rubbing my eyes with my palms as Rose pressed a light kiss to the side of my neck, mumbling, "hey, hey" and pulling my hands away.

"The management stopping us from being together. Q with those pictures. I gotta be able to do something about this, right? Someone higher up that I can get involved?"

Rose's eyes flicked away from me, glazing over in thought, her arms wrapped loosely around my neck. She inhaled slowly, raising an eyebrow before eventually talking softly.

"I think," she started, her eyes still focused on wondering. "You should definitely get somebody involved. Or leave the label. It isn't fair, or right, and I agree that it probably isn't legal, either. Also..."

She sat back, crossing her legs and looking me in the eyes, thinking carefully about whatever she was about to say. I watched her.

"I was thinking about Q, actually."

"Oh?"

She clicked her tongue, nodding.

"I was just thinking, like, if you were going to get somebody higher up involved, you'd have to tell your parents and stuff and it'd all eventually get out about us, right?"

I slowly nodded, waiting for her to get to the point before I said anything.

"Well, if it's getting out anyway, and you're totally okay with everybody knowing, then... Why are we giving Q this power? And the label? Shouldn't we just... 'out' ourselves before anyone else can? And deal with all of the shit afterwards?"

Noticing my silence, she carried on.

"I just think it'd be good for you. If you're okay with people knowing, then all this is doing is weighing you down. It's not fair."

Rose reached over to hold my hand, playing with my rings absentmindedly as she watched. I couldn't stop a little smile from appearing.

"I know it's all you think about, baby. I know you stress yourself out so much by trying to keep it a secret, and I know you have such a huge conflict about this whole situation. I just think it's time to let it go. Let yourself breathe. Live for your own truth and stop letting other people control your own life. You owe it to yourself."

•

I sighed shakily later that night, forcing myself to hit post as I put my phone down, deciding to put all my attention on my girl and this vacation before I looked at the shit that caused.