The Artist / Billie Eilish

Chapter 46

Billie's POV

Holy fuck.

I'm speechless.

This is... a life changing moment.

I don't know what to say, but...

This is the best goddamn fucking burrito I've ever eaten in my whole life.

I groaned as I finished my last bite, flopping down on the couch and closing my eyes, still chewing. I heard Finn laugh from across the room, throwing some kind of wrapper at me.

"Impressive."

Smiling dopely, I lifted my head to open my eyes, seeing him grin at me as I patted my stomach.

"The best 2 minutes of my life."

He rolled his eyes with a laugh as he stood and started to collect up some trash, tapping my knee and saying something naggy about going to bed.

I rolled my head to the side so I could see the time, and saw that it was 1am, and judging by the sweat on my forehead and the pain in my side, I would absolutely prefer to be in bed right about now so I can deal with this food baby in peace.

Sluggishly wandering over to the elevator, I slumped against the mirrored wall as the doors shut in front of me, my eyes fluttering closed for a couple seconds.

I heard the ding, and the thought of drowning in a huge ass hotel bed was the only thing forcing my eyes back open. Stumbling out of the elevator, I headed left, before turning back on myself and wandering up the opposite side of the hall.

I was trying to fish my keycard out of my backpack when I heard it.

Someone yelling.

Normally, I would've kept walking, because I was literally about to birth this burrito baby there and then.

But... it sounded familiar.

Furrowing my eyebrows and rubbing my eyes, I started to wander backwards to where the voices were coming from, getting gradually frustrated with the fact that I couldn't place that one familiar voice.

It was when I heard Rose squeal that I came back to life, turning on my heels and sprinting the last couple meters, skidding around the corner before halting in my tracks.

Oh.

Fuck.

I could've had a heart attack there and fucking then.

Locking eyes with Ethan, then Rose, then...

Aiden.

I was just about good and ready to off myself when Rose jogged over to me, her hand immediately on my cheek, comforting, soothing.

"Billie, baby, are you okay? You look like you've seen a ghost," she cooed, and I gently pulled her hand down away from her face as I watched the boys behind her, who were both watching me.

I looked at Ethan.

His eyes stared right into my soul.

He knew.

A shuddery breath left my lips as I slowly walked past Rose, my eyes never leaving Ethan's.

He looked so... Disappointed.

I just had to pray he wouldn't say anything.

I tried to communicate that with my eyes, but he didn't give me any sympathy. He was looking at me with anger.

He glanced at Aiden, and back at back at me, before shaking his head a tiny bit and storming back into the room, leaving the front door open but slamming the one for the bedroom.

Rose timidly wandered up to us, a puzzled look plastered all over her face. She looked at me desperately, my eyes glued to the floor.

"What's going on?" She whispered, edging closer to me. "Billie?"

When I didn't answer, she put her fingertips against my chin, trying to tilt my face towards hers, a single tear rolling down her cheek as my eyes met hers.

She didn't know.

But she had a feeling.

I shook my head at her softly, and felt her fingers slowly fall away from her face - delicately blinking away tears as she glanced at Aiden before disappearing into the room behind us, closing the door so softly it was almost silent.

The atmosphere in the hallway was heavy.

I couldn't even see Aiden.

I couldn't hear him, if he was speaking.

I could hear my heartbeat.

I could feel panic rising in my chest, clouding my vision, making my head foggy.

Aiden always knew what to do when I had a panic attack. He always used to comfort me, but now - now, I want him nowhere fucking near me. Ever again.

And I should've told him that a long time ago.

He reached out to hold my arms, whispering soothing nothings into my ear, rubbing my back.

I shoved him.

Hard.

His back slammed against the wall, his face plastered with shock.

"What the fuck, Billie?"

"Get away from me. Get away from Rose. Get away from us. Get the fuck away."

His mouth was still hanging open in surprise, glaring at me frustratedly as he pushed himself off the wall, taking a step towards me.

I took one back.

He shook his head in confusion, holding his fingers loosely against his temples.

"What's going on? Why're you acting like I've done some insane shit to you?"

I took a shaky breath, trying not to look too deep into his eyes.

Don't back down, now.

"You can't be here anymore. We can't do this anymore. I'm in love, Aiden, I am," I heard him groan in frustration, covering his face, "and there's nothing you can do about it. I should've broken this off a long time ago, and I didn't, and I'm an idiot, and if I've fucked up the only thing I've ever cared about because of this shit then I'll never forgive myself. Never."

He looked at me with pained again, scratching the back of his neck.

"The only thing you've ever cared about?"

Something made my eyes sting as I watched the hurt flash across his features, waiting for me to say something.

I didn't.

He laughed bitterly, wiping his cheek swiftly and turning away.

"Fine. You know what?" He turned around, grabbing my cheeks in one hand and squeezing, pulling me towards him as I squeaked in protest, batting my fists against his chest.

"I didn't love you, anyway. We were using each other. So it's whatever. But..." He snarled, almost spitting with the amount of venom laced in his voice. He dragged my face even closer to his, squeezing harder as I flinched, too scared to try to resist. His eyes locked with mine, and he stared into them with a new kind of intensity that I wasn't used to from him. "The only good part about this is that... she doesn't know. She has no fucking idea."

He pushed me back as I stumbled, unable to catch my footing as I collided with the front door behind me.

Aiden smiled.

"But she will."

And with that, I watched through blurred vision as he wandered away down the hall, not glancing back once as he turned the corner and walked out of my sight. I heard the front door open behind me softly, and I started to sob before I even felt the delicate little hands pull me in.