Tell me you love me

partial confession

At the cabin:

Zoya: hi

Aditya: hmm, so why did you want to meet me?

Zoya quietly closes the door behind her and latches it. Taking a few deep breaths, she goes towards him and stands just a foot away from him, looking into his eyes she simply asks him about his well-being... even though he promised himself to behave properly, but then he has always been a jerk. And with poker face he asks her what was she up to and why was she here? And that was it! Exasperated and worn out by his constant thwarting, she said what she has wanted to tell him from the past 3 ½ years:

'why I am here, let me tell you why I am here... you are the biggest jerk ever. Maine aapse bada darpok aaj tak nai dekha. Jab accept karne ki himmat nai h toh pyar kiya kyu? Kyu yeh khel khela jisme aap khud hi phas gaye? Aur jo kiya so kiya, aaj kis hakeem ne kaha tha ye sab drama karne k liye haan? Sab k samne mujh par be sir pair ka haq jata sakte h fir akele mein sach kehne se kyu darte h? Aur, pata h kya aap toh ahemak aur kamzarf h hi lekin zyada bAdi bevakoof hum h kyu ki, itna sab hone k bavjood I still love you and can't give up on the hope of finding answers to my questions...'

" ehsaas jo the dil mein kayi ankahe

Lafzo pe who fir aa gaye...."

As she said all that her breath hitched and tears had long started flowing down her cheeks. The picture in front of him, made him feel guilty and ashamed of his actions. For everything was fine, and it is not like that he didn't know that she has spent countless nights crying because of him but, to see her crying in front of his eyes like that, never settled down well with him. He stands up and caressing her cheeks, wipes away those tears and softly asks her what questions? To which she just shakes her head and makes an attempt to withdraw herself from his hold. But he doesn't let her go and pulls her closer in a hug. As she too embraces him, a fresh bout of tears makes it way.... Looking up she asks him in a voice that breaks his heart 1000 times over, 'why us? Why couldn't we be together?', hiding in his chest once more he heard her say the most dreadful things out loud... 'this is it... humara safar bas yahi tak tha, this is all we will ever have... hume aaj tak aap ke jaisa teacher nai mila, hum se ab vo junoon se kaam nai kiya jata jo main aap ke liye karti thi. I guess hum wapas kabhi waisi nai ban payenge jasi hum aap k sath thi...'. Slowly she detaches herself from him and nervously asks if he misses her and will be able replace her and forget her? He hated the moment she distanced herself from him, and he choked, he had no words to tell her how much he loved her and though he moved on and had a wife and family and everything, she has and always will, hold a special place in his heart, nobody could ever replace her... how he wished he could rewind the time... he wants her back in his life but he just can't bring himself up to it, to confess it yet.

Pushing her to the wall he, cupped her face and kissed her like his life depended on it. He pasted their bodies together as if trying to absorb her essence into his own. Soon he was kissing all over her face and neck. And didn't realize when his own tears got mixed with hers. If this was all they could have, then they will make the most of it. Rasping he just told/asked her to spend the night with him. She didn't say anything; from her point of view, just as much as she wanted him for her, she couldn't start an affair with a married man and hence soon she went out of his cabin. Once outside, she rushed to the washroom and splashed her face with water. In this moment she is still crying, she is sad, happy, blushing over her first kiss, trying to stabilize herself. The event is going to continue for 3 more days. And they must control their emotions and behave professionally.