Tell me you love me

moments and reasons

It has been four years since Zoya left the university. she now lives with her parents and works in their shop. Aditya is still working at the same university and has been promoted to be the head of the department. Everything has changed yet nothing has changed for Aditya, not professionally at least.

Life takes such unexpected turns sometimes that you feel the person before was someone else. The only problem with life moving on is, sometimes we are unable to emotionally move on with it... they were at a much peaceful space right now, as far as their career and family life was concerned.

Aditya lives alone in Mumbai. Initially, his family wanted him to remarry, but with time, they let him be, seeing his reluctance and volatile nature. Yes, everybody knew and understood that Aditya was a difficult man to live with. After his last encounter with Zoya when he told what happened to Jeet, all Jeet could do was gape at the size of his friend's ego. He knew there was no scope of redemption left for him. In fact, somewhere Jeet was disturbed as well as disgusted with the pompousness of Adi. after a while, he drifted away from him, knowing that he is useless and too egoistic to care.

Jeet knew what Pooja did; at first, he felt bad for Adi and despised Pooja for cheating, but now to think of it; Jeet feels that perhaps Aditya himself was responsible for what happened. He never cared for Pooja. He was grappling with his love for Zoya, true... But then, how could he blame Pooja for being dishonest to him, when he himself was attached to Zoya till the last day. the problem was, Aditya didn't give closure to any of them, he played hide and seek with Zoya, he was never willing to jeopardize his career or social image by accepting his love for her. he wanted her, but he wanted her to be a secret; have fun, in a no strings attached kind of way. Thus, he didn't push away Zoya back then, because he wanted to save his marriage; he never loved or care for Pooja enough to do that. Pooja in his perception was supposed to be the stereotypical wife, who was dumb, with no personality of her own, only present to fulfill her husband's needs. And that is the reason, why when Pooja fell in love with Yash and eloped with him; it wasn't the marriage that was shattered, it was Aditya's ego. Aditya couldn't believe that people around him could have a life of their own, and the world didn't revolve around him. His and Pooja's marriage was an arranged marriage, they both didn't even know each other properly before tying the knot. So, when they started living together, neither put any effort into the marriage and understanding each other. Pooja wanted to continue her studies, experience a fulfilling relationship and then marry the guy she loved. But, being from a small-town middle-class family, with 4 more sisters younger than her, her parents couldn't afford to educate her beyond graduation and wait for all her big plans to manifest. They married her immediately to the first good match they found. As Aditya was well settled and educated, Pooja thought maybe this wasn't as bad, and she could still live her dream with the help of her husband. The thing is it wasn't like Pooja was an amazing person and a sole victim of her marriage. She too had been only playing the blame game from day 1. She wasn't passionate towards her dreams and goals like Zoya; she just wanted those things for the glamour; she was similar to Aditya that way because even she believed it was the duty of the people around her to cater to her dreams and wishes. When Adi and Pooja got married, both just thought the other as a means of fulfilling their materialistic needs and never tried to create an emotional bonding. They would sleep together, but there was no love involved. They were even going to have a kid, but they aborted it because they felt it be a burden. Hence, when Pooja left, Aditya became even more irrational and bitter.

Then Zoya came back, and Adi tried to use her as a rebound. He had truly loved her, but he loved himself much much more, and he definitely never respected her, that is the reason why he was able to hurt her the same way over and over. Zoya too, truly loved him, only, in her case, she loved him more than herself and allowed him to treat her like trash every time, yet, forgive him again and again.

That night at the club, Aditya had reacted angrily when Jeet referred to Zoya as his mistress, not because Jeet had insulted Zoya... Jeet now understood why he was angry, he was angry because Jeet had insulted "HIS" Zoya. the emphasis being on "his". Kevin's death meant nothing to Aditya, he just said the words to support Zoya, not really meaning it. Aditya actually knew Zoya very well, and hence he had accurately predicted that Zoya would heal from the incidence; what he hadn't predicted or known well was that they were attracted to each other like magnets. If Zoya and Adi were in the vicinity, it was impossible for them to not to come together, but it was also impossible for them to not end well and suffer heartbreak at the end of it. True Zoya was exceptionally strong, but in a weirdly twisted way, Adi was her source of strength. Unknown to any of them, Aditya's nonchalance and presence were what made Zoya get over Kevin's death so soon. Zoya had still loved Aditya, which was evident from the way she reacted jealously that night, on seeing Monali flirting with Adi.

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Fated as they were to come back together time and again, they never saw this as a long-lasting thing. Zoya loved Aditya, but she was always scared to commit to him as well. She dreaded spending all her time with him and tending to his egoistical needs. She was with him for the strange psychological phenomenon where you remain in an abusive relationship, because of the unexpected highs, the adrenaline rush, and the irregular, scattered moments when you are able to get your way. Basically, one gets addicted to these unpredictable and brief euphoric moments. It is similar to the high, experienced with cocaine addiction. Once hooked, everything else, especially a normal relationship looks pale in comparison. Hence, now used to the violent love, she too chooses to remain single, but she doesn't want to go back to Aditya either.

Hence, 4 years later they still live alone, with each other's memories. They have so many memories together yet, the moments from those 3 years, during Zoya's bachelors, top the list of favorite moments. They have shared a kiss, but the memory that actually invokes butterflies is from that one day when Zoya had unexpectedly fallen in his arms....

AN: Read this, vote and comment... till then flashback is coming soon in the next part :D