I was the Mistress?!

15

Pagkagising ko ngayong araw, alam ko hindi ito magiging masayang araw. Nasa beach front kami at kumakain ng tanghalian, nasa tabi ko si Zek habang nasa harap ko si Xav, Hailey at kanilang anak. Xavier's stare is bold, nahahalata ni Zek yun kaya kanina pa siya nakakunot ang noo. Pumikit ako at suminghap ng malalim, ang gago talaga ng lalaking 'to ayaw makinig ni hindi nga natitinag. Narinig kong huminga ng malalim si Zek at padarang na binagsak ang kubyertos na hawak.

"Quit staring at my property, Xav." may diin na sabi niya, hinawakan ko agad ang kanyang kamay. Now what, asshole talaga nitong si Xavier kahit kailan.

"Hon..." nag aalala ako, ayoko ng ganito. Tumayo si Xav at yumuko palapit sa asawa ko. Stop provoking him you idiot! Gusto kong isigaw sakanya pero hindi ko magawa.

"Can I have a word with your property? I just had to ask her some questions." Ang walangya sarap sapakin. Humigpit ang hawak sa kamay ko si Zek, malapit na siyang mairita ng tuluyan.

"Why can't you ask her while we're here, is that a private question for you to take her away from here?" confuse is evident in his eyes. "Tell me, dapat ba akong kabahan? Is this the start of something that would set us both to prison someday?"

My eyes widened, I couldn't believe he has this thought within him. I won't let that happen though, all of these, the hard works and my family, his family. Everything was fine not until we gave in the temptation we shouldn't let that burned us down.

I shake my head looking at Xavier, please don't. Don't make our hardship between us gone with the fire. It will never be us at the end, I will never choose us. Pumikit ako ng madiin sa mga salitang binitawan ni Xavier.

"Like I said, it has something to do between us. That soon I will or we will discuss them to you." Dumiin lalo ang kapit niya sakin, napatingin ako kay Zek. Ang asawa ko, I can see how hurt he is. I couldn't take it so I looked away. I sense him looking at my way, sighing softly as he said.

"I trust her, you can have her now but not long. She will get rid of you, I know that." he let me go, like telling me to go with him. I was relieved and sad, both at the same time. I stood up, walked towards the end of the island, but not far from the sight of my selfless husband, but all I see was his retreating back. I sighed and turns my back on Xavier. Here goes nothing, so we can have a good talk and a smooth ending.

"Alessa." He hugged me from behind. "I'm not sorry for doing that, we badly need a talk."

I faced him, touched his face and sigh.

"Xav, this is wrong." He shook his head, tears fall from the beautiful almond set of eyes.

"I can't let you go, I talked to Hailey about us. She will support us, she said she wants us to be happy. So take me with you, God, I love you so much." He kissed me torridly, I just stood still. Unmoving, like he was kissing a statue. I pushed him to stop him and make a distance. I shook my head.

"We can't happen, maybe if we just stayed in the past, and just maybe, there will be us from then and on. But things happen, we have someone now." Napapaos kong sabi sakanya. "Our affair can't go on anymore, we will hurt those who saved us from being hurt in the past. If only we started out fine, kung sana dati hindi tayo nagkamali. Kung sana, puro tayo sana. Pero nangyari na at eto? Yung tayo? It just adds up our faults that we should cut."

"Hindi Alessa, hindi ka nakaka intindi. Alam ko nagkamali ako, pero hindi ba pwede magbago ang tao? Hindi ba pwede na nagsisi din ako at ngayon sinusubokan kong ayusin lahat?" Lumuhod siya habang nakayakap saakin. "Bakit ayaw mong lumaban? Bakit ka sumusuko ngayon? Hindi na ako yung dating gago, mahal kita at ayoko ng ganito. Gusto ko mahalin pa din kita. I don't want us to stop."

Lumuhod din ako at pinantayan siya, holding his face. I said. "This is wrong, kahit anong gawin natin itama lahat. Mali parin, kahit nuon mali ang tayo. Sa mata ng diyos at sa lahat,tayo ang may sala. Kaya habang hindi pa nag uugat, kailangan ng putolin. Tanggalin, taposin para hindi na magkasakitan at maging gago sa harap nilang lahat."

"Alessa, kahit hindi na lang ikaw. Kahit ako na lang ang lumaban, just please stay. Don't let go, I'll fight for us. Diba sabi mo dati mahalin lang kita sapat na, ngayon ako naman ang magsasabi. Mahalin mo lang ako, ako na ang bahala sa lahat."

"Alam ko, pero kahit saang anggulo mo tignan. Wala tayong pag-asa, makakaya mo ba na makita ang anak mong nasasaktan? Ako ba, kaya kong saktan ang pamilya ko? Ang anak ko sa hinaharap?" Umiling ako. "Hindi ko yun kaya, makita pa lang na umiiyak yung anak mo. Parang tinutusok ang puso ko, dahil sa babaw na pagmamahalan natin mawawalan siya ng pamilyang kalalakihan niya. What we're doing, it needs to end, mali na ayosin ng isa pang mali ang lahat Xavier."

"Mababaw? Sa tingin mo mababaw lang ang pagmamahal ko sayo?! Hindi mo alam kung anong kaya kung gawin para sa pagmamahal na sinasabi mong mababaw para sayo! Sa totoo lang, ako yung nagago dito. Hindi sila! Nagpaka tanga ako para sa pamilyang akala ko ay akin pero hindi, naniwala ako na baka. Baka mawalan ako ng pamilya dahil sayo, pero hindi ko alam na nung nawala ka mas masakit pa pala yun kaysa sa isiping mawawalan ako ng pamilya. Half of me died when you left, hindi ako makapag patuloy sa buhay. Kaya ngayon na nagkita uli tayo, hindi ko pakakawalan ang taong minsan ng nagbigay kulay sa matamlay kung buhay. You don't know how crazy I am for you, how you made me happy. How my love for you grows even when we were apart. Kaya sorry pero ayoko, hindi kita papakawalan kahit pa ang kahihinatnan ng buhay ko ay ang ilang taong pamamalagi sa kulungan. I'm all out Alessa. It's either you or nothing at all."

He walk away from me, but not in my life. He will come back and when he does, he will make sure I will end up wrapping my arms around him. Whatever you plan Xavier, I know that at the end I will always fall in your trap and maybe I will yet again ruin my already happily married life. I just hope that you are ready for the consequences Xavier. I hope this time, this is not one of those schemes of my downfall without you in it.

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Ayaw paawat ng mga cheaters eh. Tuloy pa ba or delete na? Hahaha isang wave naman diyan.