Hope Remains: A Hope Springs Fanfiction

Chapter 25

Finbarr threw everything he had into his work. Every ounce of strength. Every thought. Every waking moment. The harvest had come upon them in full force. Older children stopped going to school for the time being to help their families with the harvest. His other family members were busy harvesting their own crops, and he often found himself alone for the entire day, with no one but Grady to keep him company in his fields.

He spent his days threshing and winnowing his grain, and trying his best to not think of Emma. Unfortunately, thoughts of her entered his mind, especially when he was doing mindless work.

How was she? Was her relationship with Peter progressing? Was it not? He wished more than anything that he could go see her, but he wanted to give her space to figure out what she wanted out of life. Would she go to Baltimore? Would she choose Peter? Would she stay in Hope Springs? Finbarr had lived through many hard years that had toughened him, forced him to figure out who he was and what he wanted out of life. Emma needed that same chance to discover what she wanted, and he thought it best to get out of her way as she did it.

No matter how much his heart ached.

He rubbed the chaffs of wheat between his hands as he threshed, trying not to think about how much more work he still had ahead of him. Why couldn't he have chosen berries instead of wheat?

Oh, that was right. Because he couldn't see the berries.

Grady's collar jingled as he got to his feet, and he barked once, alerting Finbarr to someone's presence. He stood straighter and wiped the sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand.

"Hard at work, Finbarr?" Katie called to him, her footsteps drawing nearer. "Would you look at this field? You're getting close to finishing."

"Not nearly," he chuckled as he ran his hand across the heads of his wheat. "Cutting the wheat is one thing. Winnowing is another thing altogether. I'm very nearly contemplating making a better offer than Ryan for Aiden's help."

"At this rate, Aiden is going to become a very rich man."

He grinned at the thought. Farming never made one rich. But it was satisfying. He had land. He had a house. His family lived nearby. That was more riches than he ever needed.

"I know how hard the men work during the harvest," she continued, taking a couple more steps closer. "I'm making my rounds and delivering biscuits."

"Just you?" he asked, peering around her despite seeing nothing but black.

She handed him a couple biscuits, which he took gratefully. "Emma isn't here, if that's who you're looking for."

"I wasn't—"

"Don't lie to me, Finbarr O'Connor," she scolded. "You're hoping that a certain brunette lass will come calling. But you were the one who told her to leave. What makes you think she'd come back?"

He didn't say anything for a long few moments as he stared downward and scuffed his boot into the dirt. If Katie didn't think Emma would come back after this, then it must be bad. All he had wanted was to give her space to figure out what she wanted, and to court Peter in the process to help her decide what she wanted.

Suddenly, he got the feeling that Katie didn't come to just deliver her baked goods. She came to chat. That was not a good sign.

"Peter came by to talk to Joseph last night," Katie said, and his heart sunk to his toes as he realized why. "Now, I like Peter. I have no qualms about him becoming a part of the family, but I just..." She sighed, and it sounded weary, as if she hadn't gotten much sleep the night before. "I like you more, Finbarr. There, I said it. And don't you dare tell anyone I confessed as much. I will allow Peter to marry Emma, but I won't like it. I am disappointed at the thought. My heart squeezes every time I think about it."

"He...he's asked her then?"

"No," she replied, and then a gentle hand touched his. It was the hand that didn't have all of her fingers. He knew she tried to hide that hand from others, but she never hid it from him. It meant the world to him that she didn't hide it from him, because it often reminded him that they had experienced the same terror for the ones they loved the night when the barn had collapsed. Emma and Ivy would never understand what he and Katie understood. Not completely, at least.

"Why did you come here?" he asked quietly. "I'm not going to interfere. Emma knows how I feel about her. When Peter asks... I can only hope she will keep me in her thoughts."

Katie sighed again, but this one wasn't because of weariness but rather frustration. "Does Emma really know how you feel? You rejected her. You told her to leave."

Finbarr shook his head exasperatedly. "I told her she can't court two men. And because she seemed so stubborn to keep courting Peter, I had to back out. Emma needs to figure out what she wants." He angrily took a bite of the biscuit in his hand, but that anger melted away immediately. "Oh. This is good."

"Good enough to convince Peter not to propose?"

Shaking his head, he said, "Emma is far better than your cookies, no offense intended. It wouldn't even entice me not to propose."

"Why don't you propose, Finbarr? Beat Peter to it."

Her voice was practically begging him to do it, and he really wished he could. His heart ached so much at the thought of Peter proposing, and even more at the thought of Emma saying yes.

"I can't," he whispered. "It's not the right time. She would resent me if I did it like this."

"You're probably not wrong about that, Finbarr," she said with a sigh. "Sometimes I'm convinced she has stubborn Irish blood in her."

Finbarr wanted to smile at that, but he couldn't. His heart ached a little too much to smile at that moment. He knew this day had been coming for a while now. Emma had to make up her mind about what she wanted, and whether she wanted Peter or Finbarr in her life. Finbarr's love for Emma was strong enough to transcend anything, but what about hers?

"Then I suppose all we can do is wait," Katie said a bit dejectedly. "Waiting is killing me."

"You and me both, Katie. You and me both."

To his surprise, she wrapped her arms around him and gave him a squeeze. "Whatever happens, I hope you keep coming around. You are like a son to me and Joseph. You know that, right?"

He nodded, his emotions closing up inside his throat. Joseph had helped Finbarr through his toughest years, and Katie had been such a huge support for him. There was no life he could imagine that didn't have the Archer family in it.

"I promise to keep coming around if you promise to keep baking those oatmeal biscuits of yours."

Katie laughed, and it helped ease the ache inside his heart. "Now that's a promise I can make. You keep up the good work, alright?"

He nodded his head once and listened to Katie's retreating footsteps. This was possibly the last time he'd talk to Katie or even Emma before he left for the depot. And when he would return in several weeks, he wasn't sure what to expect.