Human Bumblebee x Reader Boyfriend Scenarios

Emotionless Author

Decided to let you all know I feel nothing anymore I don't know what love is I have no perception of what it is just what I've read or see on games. I don't know if I love my family or even if I love myself. I'm broken I've held in so many emotions that I just don't feel anymore. I fake everything and I don't know how to fake it anymore. I'm lost and I just don't think I should've been here like I'm an extra piece that nobody wants. My family says it's a phase to be good and always stay on your medicine that it'll help but I know it's not my thoughts are rushed and I can never stay on topic I'm a bitch all the time with people who care for me and I don't mean to be it just comes out. The voices are the only comfort I have but they aren't good for me yet they make me feel okay but I'm just a shell of nothing. I stopped taking my medicine because I don't know I feel like I'm not going to be here anymore. Like it's close and it sends tingles down my spine and causes some kind of reflex in my brain but yet nothing comes out not a cry for help nor the thoughts to tell my therapist or doctor for they will give me something that won't work. And I'm tired of being a medicine zombie who puts on a fake smile to get through the day so nobody looks at me weird or ask if I'm okay or for goodness sake tell me to pray about it. I want and need help now but I don't want to ask for it because I feel something when I hurt and I want to give in and then maybe I'll feel better. I feel like I don't have a heart and that when the voices comfort me I feel like my heart is there and then I begin to wonder if this is what's it's like to become insane. I get envious of people in my family being able to express love so freely and with people that love them back when I don't even know what the feeling is and if I even love myself. I just want to not be like here in the existence. This is far from I believe I cry for help would be I don't know what this is I just feel like I need to tell somebody that maybe if I leave something that someone would remember me and maybe someday figure out how to help the next person who feels like me who fakes it and gives in when they've been strong for to long and just give in when they know it's not getting better.

I just wished i could feel the emotions others feel and actually feel loved and give that feel back....