8. not alone

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You closed your eyes, hoping that Strange would be gone when you opened them again. Hoping, that you would be back in your tiny flat. Hoping that this whole day turned out to be a dream. Giving you an idea of how horrible a day could be.

When you opened your eyes again, your hopes were shattered. In a way. Strange was still there. That meant, that this day had been as real as it could have been. Which was very. But something had changed about him. His posture. His eyes. His mouth. Everything. The sharp edge of anger had completely disappeared.

He had changed his mind. Somehow. You were not yet sure, what about.

"Come on" , he said. His voice was thick with something. Heavy with emotions you couldn't name.

You had hoped, that he had changed his mind about the hospital thing. Apparently he hadn't. But, despite your speach earlier, you lacked the energy to really fight him. Today had been tough. Not physically, mentally. The toughest of days in quit a while.

You wanted to sleep.

You closed your eyes again.

And then Strange's hand was on your arm, gently leading your way. You didn't open your eyes, just stumbled forwards. Because you didn't want to see where you were going. You were sure that it would be the hospital. There was no need to see it. Things don't lose any degree of truth if you don't see them.

And then Strange stopped. You stopped with him. His hand disappeared from your arm. And then there was a silent sizzling noise. You had never heard that sound before. It was a mix between a cats angry hissing and the noise a sparkler made. Strange.

"Come on" , said Strange again. His voice was soft and quiet and deep and warm. Overhelming. Full of a love you had never received.

You opened your eyes.

In front of you you could see a portal. It hovered in the air, a few millimetres above the ground. It was big enough to allow you to walk through it without having to bend down. Behind it there was a room that looked suspiciously like a hospital room. A bed. A bedside table. White, clean walls. The smell of disinfectant hit you when you inhaled the air of this room. It wasn't the one you had left behind.

You still didn't want to go there.

"Don't worry, this is the hospital part of the Avengers compound. You will be safe there. And there will be no doctors around. At least not in white coats. And there will be no beeping" , explained Strange. His voice came from behind you and sounded so reassuring. You believed him. But you didn't understand. Why would he bring you to the Avengers compound? You'd rather have gone home. But this was better than the hospital.

So you took a careful step forward and through the portal. And you really found yourself in the room you had seen. You were used to things that were beyond explanation but still... This was impressive.

The bed in front of you looked soft and inviting, but you still hesitated. Then Strange was next to you. The warmth of his body was reassuring in a way. You couldn't explain it. There were no words for it.

"Lie down" , he suggested. You really wanted to. But all of a sudden every step seemed too much. There was no power left in your limbs. You couldn't lift your legs. You weren't even sure if you could stay upright for much longer.

Strange caught you, when you collapsed. He held you in his arms like one would hold a porcelain doll. Apparently afraid of breaking you. Which he couldn't have done. Not physically.

He smelled nice. Of roses and old books and tea and love.

"I am tired" , you whispered while burying your face in his clothes. It felt like the right thing to do. The proper thing to do. You never wanted to be put down. You wanted to fall asleep like this and never wake up. But your chest was still painful.

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