Tell Me A Lie (A One Direction Fan Fic)

A Dollar Makes Me Holler

"Come on Avey Davey! We gotta go!" 7 year old Harry yelled out. I grinned and ran over towards him, but as he saw me running, he started sprinting himself, so ahead of me it was ridiculous. I huffed and puffed, my frail body couldn't handle it. I collapsed on the ground, hearing Harry shout out above me, but I slipped into blackness.

Now, we were at our conjoined 10th birthday party. Harry was blowing out the candles on our cake, while my mom was yelling at me in the corner of the room. Again, I collapsed, and everything shifted into the dark.

Now, it was our prom, one week before Harry and I broke up. I was wearing a blue floor length silk gown, and harry had a white rose corsage in hand, placing it on my wrist. He grinned at me and leaned in for a kiss, which my mother happily snapped a picture of. Once more, of course, I collapsed and shifted into the darkness.

I shot up with a start, immediately feeling a sharp stinging in the entire right side of my body. I held it through the thin fabric of my tank top. I had fallen off of the bed and onto a pair of high heels. It was all just a dream? The crash was just a dream?

Well that's a relief. I thought with a sigh, letting a smile slip onto my lips. I rubbed my side lightly, throwing the stripper heels across my room and into my closet. Of course, with my shit aim, the heel hit the wall and actually broke through the plaster, managing to get stuck in the wall. I shrugged, muttering a simple 'I'll get it later', and stood up. I walked out of the semi-clean room, and straight towards my kitchen.

Unsurprisingly, I had no food, as always. I'll just mooch off of Anne, which was definitely the easiest route. I saw Kara camped out on my couch, bottles littering the table as usual. Looks like someone hit the vodka a little too hard last night. Then again, my sister is a slut when it comes to liquor, so it doesn't necessarily surprise me anymore. I sighed and gathered up her bottles, setting them in the recycling bin in our kitchen.

I checked twitter, only to see literally thousands of tweets. I sighed as I saw just how retarted some people were. I get that you're stupid, but do you really need to prove it to the entire world? I closed off the app before I blew my top. All of the tweets were saying things like, 'You weren't good enough anyways', 'You're a skanky whore', and 'Perrie is so much prettier than you are'. Well no shit, Einstein. She's gorgeous. I may admit to a bit of internet stalking, yes. Then again, my boyfriend basically cheated on me with her. I have a right to.

I pulled off my soffee shorts and threw them into the hamper in the laundry room next to the kitchen, walking around in my underwear. I honestly didn't care, considering the only other person here was Kara, and she's seen me in worse. Besides, she's dead to the world anyways. I was still in a tank top. Not like it mattered. I wasn't showing off my tits like a dollar makes me holler.

I grabbed the milk carton out of the fridge, taking a gulp straight out of the jug.

Because I'm badass.

I walked over and pulled out a bagel, one of the last remnants of food left, and popped it into the toaster. I turned on my iPhone and went to my music selection, and chose to listen to Take Me Home, One Direction's new album. Now, while I hate them with a passion now, it doesn't mean that I can't respect them as musicians. They're actually very talented.

Too bad they're ratchet skanks.

Irresistible started playing, and I began singing along.

"It makes your lips, so kissable, and your kiss, unmissable. Your fingertips so touchable, and your eyes irresistible," A voice behind me sang. That voice was pretty well known to me, and I smiled slightly, in spite of myself. I turned around to see Harry behind me, a smirk gracing his face.

"What?" I asked him. I took a bite of my bagel, yawning loudly. He continued smirking, almost in a proud way. I rolled my eyes and turned around, grabbing the orange juice and pouring two glasses: One for me, and one for Harold.

He took the glass greedily and gulped it down

"Are you going to tell me why you're looking like such a cocky bastard or ll I have to beat it out of you?" I asked him in a way that seemed threatening to me, but lame as ass to him.

"Where'd your pants go, Avey Davey?"

Fuck face McGee. I groaned and rolled my eyes, not caring. "Harold, we've had sex. I'm pretty sure you've seen me in less clothing than this." He blushed madly and gulped down the rest of his orange juice. Now it was my turn to smirk.

But reality struck and I looked at him again. "Seriously, what are you doing here? I kinda sorta hate you all now." I said simply, shrugging as if it were a matter of which sweater to wear.

His smiled completely dissolved and he scratched the back of his head. Wait, is Harry......nervous? I hardly ever made Harry nervous. This oughta be good.

"Actually, yes. You see...I'm a woman." No shock there. Harry groaned and wiped his hands down his face in frustration. "Okay, so the actual thing is that your parents are coming home in a few hours. Your mum called my mum and it was just one big thing." Okay...no problem there.

"So what's got your dick in a box?" I asked confused. This makes no sense. Yet another infamous nervous laugh burbled out of Harolds mouth.

"Well, you see, my mum answered the phone and they started talking....and my mom was a little confused about everything....soshetoldherweweredating."

If Anne had a dick, hers would be trapped in a box too.

AUTHORS NOTE:

Hey wattpad. It's good to be back.

I'm going to try to make this story NOT too cliche. I know right now it's SUPER SUPER SUPER SUPER SUPER cliche, but it won't be for long. I have all these ideas in my head, and if it plays out like I want it to, then it'll get better. A LOT better. So don't lose hope yet my peasants(:

So I took a little break. I just needed one. Everything was completely screwed up in my life and I needed a breather. But m back now, so expect a lot more activity from me! I'm writing this from my iPad so sorry for any misspellings and/or grammatical mistakes.

If you enjoyed, vote and comment. If not, tell me why. I'm trying to get better at writing, ya know?

Your Queen, 

Lauren