Life Will Change (Ryuji x Akira AU)

Chapter 5 - It's Not a Game

Ryuji's POV

What is the deal with all this? Seriously, none of it makes any sense. It's been two weeks since Akira's transferred here. And he still insists on trying to befriend me. Everyone gives him strange looks, and I've definitely heard a good number of insults. But nothing fazes him. Not even Miss President.

Apparently, she's supposed to be his soulmate but they can't stand each other. Makoto's all high and mighty and is a huge stickler for the rules while Akira's the exact opposite. I thought we were supposed to be totally compatible with our partner. Besides me of course, but that's just because I'm broken. Shiho too, I guess. Well, they haven't rejected each other yet I guess but it still seems weird. I just hope he doesn't end up like me.

I don't know why he won't just get the hints that I'm sending him though. I can accept that he may actually be a nice guy and not want to torment me, so he's like Ann, cool. But what doesn't make sense is why he's so persistent. I told him I wanted nothing to do with him and yet he still insists on trying to get close to me. I don't get it. No one's ever been so persistent. Ann realized I wanted her to leave right away and she did it. So why is he still trying to do this? Gyah. I don't think I'll ever get it. I never get anything in this messed up world.

If life is a game then it's a game I can't win. I'll never amount to anything. I've accepted that. It's just the way things are. If it means keeping all the others from being treated bad, then I can take it. I can take all the pain, I can bear it alone. But now he's here trying to help. I so badly just want to isolate myself from him. So why is it... that I can't bring myself to do so?

Despite every choice I've ever made screaming at me to stop, I can't bring myself to push him away any further. But why? Is it... because I want help? But I can't. I can't get help from anyone. They'll just get hurt too. If that happened because of me... I couldn't live with myself.

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Akira's POV

"Alright, let me get this straight, you guys used to have a ping-pong team, and they stopped it because someone tripped a fire alarm with a ball?" I ask Ryuji, who's been vividly recalling the very exciting (at least to him) ping-pong tournaments the school. It was a team without Kamoshida as the coach, so it actually had some pretty good times until someone did something stupid. Still, Ryuji actually seems to enjoy talking about it so I'm content to just hear him out about it. It's one of the few topics he can talk about without looking pained at some point. Honestly, I really enjoy hearing him talk like this. He's so stupid but so smart at the same time.

"Another plain old sandwich for lunch today, huh?" I ask him.

"Like you're one to talk. You smell like coffee every day, clearly, you have way too much of that!" Ryuji responds.

"Hey, I live in a cafe, can you really blame me?"

It's been... three weeks since I got here? That sounds right. And I'm finally starting to get through to him. He's been through so much, he locked himself up tight. And then he shattered the key like glass. Now I've finally found the first of those pieces. And I'm gonna keep finding them one by one until I manage to get him back to normal.

Eventually, we have gym. It's actually become pretty tolerable now, not gonna lie. Ryuji - and by extension, I - typically have the odds stacked against us, but Ryuji finally is starting to seem like he can handle it. He's finally not automatically terrified by every word Kamoshida says.

Once we finish our exercise for the day we have a few minutes to relax and chat.

"You know, I always used to compare life to a game," Ryuji says in the middle of our conversation.

"What do you mean?" I ask him.

"Well, I just mean that it always seemed like everyone acted like characters inside of a video game. Most of the kids here are like NPCs, blindly following whatever protocol is going on in their head. Kamoshida's like a boss I can't get past. And then, there's you... I can't figure out what you are yet," He says, and as he says the last part his gaze lingers on me for a bit before turning away.

"Well, that's probably because it's not a game," I tell him. "We're not just some robot AI's challenging God with the power of friendship or something like that. We're not some phantoms, we exist. We're human," As I say that, his eyes seem to light up a bit.

"Heh... you like that song too then?" He asks.

"Yup, definitely my favorite."

"Cool, we probably have similar tastes in music."

"Maybe we should share some of our music sometime? Listen to it together?" As soon as I say it, I regret it because he seemed so happy to talk about our similar music tastes but then he freezes. "I mean if you don't want to, we definitely don't need to. It was just a suggestion, I didn't -" "Yes," This time it's my turn to freeze.

"Y-yes? You mean... Are you sure?" I confirm. He nods. "Okay, cool. Where should we go, and what time works for you?"

"U-uh... any time is fine, but I'd be most comfortable in my house, I think," He says. Wow. Shit. Okay. This is happening. Okay, shit, another piece from his shattered key is back in place. Another step closer to opening his heart.

"Alright, then how about we do it right after school today? Unless that's too soon?"

"No, today... should be okay."

"Alright, cool."

"Cool."